How to Harry Potter Your Next Birthday Bash

The Little Lady is already creating Pinterest boards around the theme of her next birthday party.

Her birthday is in August.

This year will be her 10th b-day and I think that this might be it for the big, birthday bashes. That is until she turns 13 and 16 and 18 and 21. . .

Here's a look at how we Harry Potter'd her last b-day celebration at home.

Invites

I certainly wasn't going to be delivering invites via owl, although I briefly considered sending snail mail invites with a red wax seal, until I realized that was legit crazy.

The better option was Paperless Post. They have super cute, high-quality designed invites and they just so happen to have a few that are wizard-themed. The best thing about an online invite is that all the info is easy accessible. I have a recurring anxiety dream where I am late for birthday parties or go on the wrong day. This is an easy way to keep all the scheduling and guests in order, plus they are totally on-theme!

Hogwarts Houses Option

We picked this one for the Little Lady

I also love it when we get invites from Paperless Post. I always know that I find the date and time, save to my calendar and never be late for a party! Plus the internet is kind of magical right? You really can't go wrong with either wizard-themed option, not to mention the hundreds of other invite styles and themes.

Decorations

Once we sent out the invites, we hit Pinterest hard for design and decorating ideas and came up with a few good ideas on our own!

I did want the kids to feel like they were entering the Wizarding World and the first stop was Platform 9 3/4. We covered the front door with Brick Backdrop and printed out a Platform 9 3/4 printable that we found online.

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We also think no event is complete without a candy bar. We printed Harry Potter themed candy names from the book onto vellum paper, cut with craft scissors and attached to containers. I found the Ron, Hermione and Harry print outs online and filled them with Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans.

I bought some small glass containers and printed potion names on vellum, glued them to the bottles and let the kids have a potion slime party. It was a good activity and they got to keep the super cute container. 

Slime, slime and more slime.

Last but not least, I ordered each kid a Harry Potter themed pajama. That, along with the candy from Honeydukes ended up being the party favor. I am a firm believer in party favors you can eat or wear! Check out the super cute  Hermione nightgown the Little Lady is sporting. 

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Or are you more of a Harry Potter fan?

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We also set up a photo booth for all the kids. You'll recognize this from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. I just cut out the middle of a poster board and downloaded and printed the text. Yes, I am Sirius it was that easy. Sorry had to Harry Potter pun it.

We had a few more details that I will share in another post. Hope you have a few ideas to get your Harry Potter party started.

I Accept This Award on Behalf of All Women

I know award season has come to an end, but for the last 10-15 years I have been perfecting my award acceptance speech. This exercise has kept me sane on the treadmill, on long drives in the car and on those nights when the worry creeps in and the sleep is hard to come by.

I decided that today, on International Women's Day, that I would share that speech with a few modifications.

Oh my goodness! Thank you, thank you so much. First of all I would like to thank the Academy. I want to thank all of my readers who read this book and let me know how much they loved it. I want to thank the amazing cast and crew--Jen, Ben, thank you for believing in this project and thank you for coming together to truly capture the inner lives of these characters.

Oops, should probably start a little later on. . .


I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for an incredible support system of women in my life. I would like to thank my grandmothers, one who is still with us and one who is not. These two women raised 15 children between them, they lived through war, they buried children, they worked full-time jobs, they prayed for me, they let me live with them, they showed up at my 4th grade field trip, and passed down a shirt that read "A Woman's Place is in the House and the Senate" that I wore, sans pants, to a local diner the day my sister fell off the loft bed and split open her chin.

I would like to thank my mother. (This is the part where I envision fanning myself a bit and holding back tears.) Thank you for your sacrifices, your selflessness and your unending support. Thank you for showing up when I needed you and knowing when to let me figure it out on my own. Thank you for continuing to show up whenever and where ever needed, for not only me and my children, but for anyone you can help.

Thank you to my mother-in-law for raising a boy who became a man who became an incredible father.

Thank you to my sisters. One led the way my entire life. Thank you for taking those first steps into the unknown so I didn't have to brave it alone. Thank you for treating my children as your own and stepping in to help me whenever I need it.

Thank you to my younger sister who taught me what it means to love unconditionally and who to this day continues to do nothing but amaze me.

Thank you to my best friend, who I have known since we were 18 months old. There are really no words to describe your influence on my life. I love you. Thank you. I'm calling you in 10 minutes to talk about all of the celebrities I have seen in the bathroom.  (I am hoping that one day I can use that line.)

Thank you to the mass group of amazing aunts, my sisters-in-law, nieces, and all my cousins--especially my DePeter girls, who make me laugh louder than anyone and let me bitch about anything I want.

To my Loyola Ladies--who would have thought that a random room selection would influence our lives in so many ways? Thank you all for your fierce friendship.

To all my mom group friends, PTO moms and the moms at school. We may not all do it the same way, we may be mothers who work, mothers who don't, mothers who volunteer or just write a check, we may be mothers who are navigating our first kids through school or our third, but we all show up and we all do what we can and I am thankful we aren't doing it alone.

Finally, to my daughters, my smart, funny, creative ladies who made me a mother. Use your voices. Don't be afraid and always dream big.


I think the music is probably playing at this point, the celebrities are wondering who I am, and I am being escorted away by who I hope is Tina Fey and Amy Poehler towards that mysterious back room where the press probably isn't so interested in the "Best Adapted Screenplay" winner. Hoping my makeup is looking good and my feet don't kill me in these heels. . .


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Please note: I would be nowhere without plenty of men in my life. Wait, I should rephrase that.

Motherhood in the Sweet Spot

My children are no longer babies. While they will always be my 3 Beans, we have reached what I like to call the sweet spot in parenting.

That's right. It can happen. Everyone can get dressed by themselves, feed themselves, respond to and follow simple demands (although this might take some repetition), and for the most part function normally in society, with the exception of them running through hotel hallways and Target aisles like gazelles being pursued on an African plain.

The transition from newborns to toddlers to tweens did not take long. And while I miss the sweet, smelling newborns against my skin, the inquisitive toddlers exploring their world and the toothless smiles of kindergarten and first grade, I am grateful for this time that I find myself in.

This is the best I got of all 3 of them!

The Lady is 11. While she is a full on tween who is navigating middle school, social media and the expectations and changes associated with her age, she hasn't quite reached the point where she has sequestered herself in her room. She still allows me to hug her, tell her how much I love her, and dance terribly in front of her without too much embarrassment or rolling of her eyes. She is the most introverted yet independent of my children and demands the least attention from me, for now.

The Little Lady is 9 going on 19. She wears her emotions on her sleeve, is quick to lash out, but loves, loves so freely. She is social and funny and wants more than anything to spend time with her family (when she isn't staring at a screen of course!) playing games, watching movies, baking and creating. She does roll her eyes--frequently, but what she wants most is my attention and time, for now.

QT is 7. How did my baby get so old? He asks the most random questions that I can tell he has been thinking about and then just kind of starts to speak as if we all have been part of the conversation going on in his head. He loves video games and hanging out with his friends. He is always coming really close to the proverbial "line" and can still for the most part get away with it by batting his long eyelashes and smiling, for now.

For now, what I want is to recognize this time, take advantage of it before the doors close and the eyes really roll. For now, I want my children to see our family as a safe space, to be themselves wholly and without fear or doubt before the outside influences, the peer pressure, the impact on their self-confidence continues to creep its way in. Life is coming for them but for now, in this sweet spot of time, I want them to know that their terrible dancing, Grateful Dead loving, lapsed runner and blogger of a mom is here and loving each of them for who they are right now.

New Year, Blah, Blah, Blah

Are we done with the "New Year, New You" posts? Are we settling into 2017? Has everyone recommitted to something and are we all pursuing our goals? Yes? No? 

I have only made one resolution and that is to take more showers.

I feel that this is doable and may just be that initial first step towards implementing more change in my life. If I shower, I might wear actual clothes and not just sweatpants and leggings. If I wear actual clothes, I might notice that I they don't fit quite right. If I notice that they don't fit quite right, I might actually motivate to start eating better and fitting in a workout. If I workout then I definitely will need to shower more.

It is a little bit like "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie" except I am trying to eat less cookies and have better hygiene.

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I did take one of those Facebook quizzes that you are supposed to share on your feed, but that I never do. I like to know who would be my consigliere if I was a mafia boss and what is going to happen in the future dependent on a random algorithm and sites that I am pretty sure are just gathering all my personal information. I mean really what is the difference between some computer-generated output vs. something you may read in a magazine or that Oprah told you? If that site says that in 2017 I need to start to Let Go, who am I to say it is wrong?

I am starting with the easy stuff: Clothes, books, toys, etc., and hoping that repeating "Let it go" as a mantra that I don't get sucked into singing Disney songs on a loop for the whole of 2017. First big donation pick up is today. Let's hope the truck gets here before the kids get off the bus and start picking through things they haven't seen or played with in months. Wish me luck. 

Moms who say Meh

Christmas is coming and it is a crazy time of year.

I have been trying to establish some Holiday traditions and give my kids something to look forward to every year. I am also trying to keep them busy and active while all the chaos is unfolding around us.

This is the time I usually look to Pinterest to see what types of things I should be doing. Once that four hours of browsing is wasted, I try to take the easiest, most doable things I find and at least make an attempt to include them in the Holiday season.

Some things turn out better than others. It is just like the "eyes are bigger than your stomach" adage, there are so many amazing things out there to do for the holidays but where do you find the time and energy? Plus, it is kind-of hard to scroll your fb feed and see all the cute, crafty projects that are going on at other peoples' houses without feeling like perhaps you are failing at supermom. 

But let's be honest, there are some people who thrive at those types of things, who really commit to it. Then there are the rest of us, you know the Moms who say Meh. We want to do something, we are willing to try, but we aren't going to totally kill ourselves over it.

It is for you mothers out there, my people, my Moms who say Meh that I bring you three projects that you can accomplish with very little effort and in very little time. 

The Christmas Lights Scavenger Hunt

This is an amazingly easy activity for the kids. If you live on the East Coast like I do, you know that darkness descends on us around 4:30 in the afternoon. It is brutal. Not only is it dark, it is cold and you still have to schlep everyone around in giant puffer hoodies while they would rather risk breaking a leg ice skating on the driveway than actually putting on gloves and getting in the car. If any of this sounds familiar, print out a couple of these Christmas Lights Scavenger Hunt lists that I created and you might save yourself a few minutes of your kids screaming in the car or having to listen to Paw Patrol on a loop on the entertainment system. It is also just nice to drive around a little through the neighborhoods and see all the lights.

Christmas Printables

This idea I took directly from Pinterest. We love the movie Elf here, so I just found a free printable online, printed it out and framed it. I set it on the table in the hallway and voila, easy holiday decorations. If you are more crafty than I am you can just create your own using any movie quotes or songs you like. The original pin is here. Easy. Enjoy.

Homemade Snow

The Lady has been asking me for weeks if we have Borax. Shockingly, we do not. Does anyone? Apparently, she has been watching a ton of YouTube videos on how to make your own homemade snow and Borax seems to be the go to ingredient in a lot of these homemade projects. Eventually, she found a recipe that didn't include Borax and had only two ingredients: Shaving Cream (original, not gel) and Baking Soda. 

This is so easy, literally a two step process.

Step 1: Gather the shaving cream and baking soda

Step 2: Throw directly into your garbage can

See! So simple! So easy! So not worth it unless you want your house to smell like all your uncles did in 1985, and have a white, flaky mess to clean up. 

We will see what projects we come up with over the break, or maybe not because, well meh. 

Merry! Merry!

All I Want for Christmas is My Van Detailed

Seriously, a full car clean out is on the top of my list this year. Why? Well, how about I tell you in song. .  .

The Twelve Days of Christmas (A van-themed edition by The Three Bean Salad)

On the first day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

A cracked and scratched DVD

On the second day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Two beach pails, and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the third day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the fourth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the fifth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

A few fallen goldfish

On the sixth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the seventh day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Seven fruit snack wrappers, six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD.

On the eighth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Eight bottle caps broken, seven fruit snack wrappers, six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the ninth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Nine Arcade Tokens, eight bottle caps broken, seven fruit snack wrappers, six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the tenth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Ten little Legos, nine arcade tokens, eight bottle caps broken, seven fruit snack wrappers, six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the eleventh day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Eleven popcorn pieces, ten little Legos, Nine arcade tokens, eight bottle caps broken, seven fruit snack wrappers, six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

On the twelfth day of Christmas my Minivan gave to me

Twelve Dunkies napkins, eleven popcorn pieces, ten little Legos, nine arcade tokens, eight bottle caps broken, seven fruit snack wrappers, six lollipops sticking, five goldfish, four juice box straws, three French fries, two beach pails and a cracked and scratched DVD

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MiniRu could probably stand an external wash as well

I did clean out MiniRu yesterday, and by clean out I mean removed a ton of crap ranging from Laffy Taffy stuck underneath the Little Lady's booster to a single strand of uncooked spaghetti. Car detailing is definitely on my Christmas List. What is the craziest thing you have found in your car?

On #Throwback Thursday

My father called me a few weeks ago to tell me that he was cleaning out his storage unit and would I want my lacrosse jacket from 1994 and a Pop Warner softball jacket from what I can only imagine was 1986.

I said I would take the lax jacket, but I was all set with the other. The next time my mom came over both jackets were with her. The softball jacket was so faded you could barely read the writing on the back. It promptly went into the donate bag. The lacrosse jacket, I hung in my closet. It was in pretty good shape for being almost 22 years old and I thought even though I haven't seen or worn it in that long, why give it away?

Later, a bin of stuff showed up.

• A scrapbook from senior year full of programs from sports dinners, my college acceptance letter
• A Far Side collection of comics that when I leafed through it contained an envelope with my original birth certificate in it
• Photos from senior year and prom
• Ticket stubs, a lot of pictures from nights that I don't have much recollection of (probably for a myriad of reasons!), but filled with the young, young faces of friends: The first boy I ever loved. The last boy I ever loved. Girls who turned into almost 40-year-old women who I am grateful for everyday.

Say my name, sun shines through the rain, my whole life so lonely then you come and ease the pain. . . I don't want to lose this feeling. . . Do you like the special effects I put on this pic? I thought it was very eternal flamy.

I pulled out a shoebox that contained letters written by my high school friends to me freshman year of college, all tinged with a bit of homesickness, before some of us drifted apart, when we were still trying to maneuver in that new environment, still trying to hold onto the ties of the past. On top of those letters were cassette tapes, and not only were there mix tapes and full albums of music, but there were cassette singles. You know, like you bought it for one song, I am imagining it was more than the $1.09, iTunes charges, but still. I am embarrassed to tell you what they were. Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You" (a classic, really--oh The Bodyguard), The Bangles "Eternal Flame" (totally necessary), Jesus Jones, "Right Here Right Now" (I have no excuse for this one), Edie Brickell and the New Bohemians, "What I Am" (a song that till this day reminds me of sophomore year in high school) and finally Bonnie Raitt, "Not the Only One" (I am at a loss here).

A few ticket stubs, I think I can toss these.

But what of all this stuff? Can you donate cassette tapes to Goodwill? Will they even take them? As nostalgic as it was to go back through all this, what can I actually do with it? Put the scrapbooks on the shelf. Toss out a photo or two for #tbt? When do the memories become enough?

My father called me again a couple of days ago. Do I want my writing from college? Yes. Do I want my drawings from kindergarten? I don't even want my own kids' drawings from kindergarten. I have bins full of photos, of artwork from preschool on. I have that constant dialogue in my head will we need it someday? will my kids want these memories of theirs? will my kids want this of mine?

I can't get rid of that thought that if there is no proof then it is forgotten. And isn't that what we all want? Proof of our own lives, a life well lived?

My kids won't have much of a box to sort through. Most of their lives have been documented, written about, filtered, posted and shared. There is something to be said about the endlessness of the Internet, where all you have to do is type something in and up it comes, but there is also something to be said about handwritten letters tucked in a Gap shoebox, the photo negatives, a note written on yellow legal pad that wrapped a $20 bill from my dad, the reminder that tucked in all those photos were the people and events who made you who you are.

I am not embarrassed to say that he still slips me $20s every once in a while.

So the cassette tapes will go, the photos I will hold onto for a while, the letters I will read and re-read. Not because I am trying to relive some glory days or hold on too tight to the past, but because those are the faces, the voices of the people who mattered the most to me at that time and that place, and there is something to be said for remembering.

I try to live now for the present, for my babies and to do all those things I said I would then. I try to follow through, in the immortal words of Jesus Jones, right here, right now.

P.S. if you went to high school with me, expect some texts/emails with photos to come your way. I have hundreds.

P.P.S. there was also a Richard Marx, "Right Here Waiting" single cassette tape in there. I said it. Go ahead and judge, but I guarantee you are singing that right now.