I like to think that each day offers its challenges and successes. I mean there has to be a little bit of a payoff for enduring poo foot and temper tantrums right?
I also like to think that sometimes you find a little bit of clarity in a place you would never expect. Yesterday, as I was driving home from my sister-in-law's where the Lady got to hang with Ironman and the Little Lady tried very hard to play the role of the big sister to my newborn niece (this included trying to shove the baby's pacifier into her mouth on numerous occasions, when it was quite clear that the babes was not interested), with both Ladies sleeping in the backseat, the DVD player not spewing Strawberry Shortcake dialogue (really, how many times can you use the word "berry" in place of "very?" talk about overkill), the radio off, on a two lane highway on the back roads of Connecticut, I pulled up behind a white VW bug (a new one) with the licence plate that read CATPWR.
CATPWR. In that one moment, I thought to myself "Bean, your life isn't that bad--go home, give your husband a 5, nay a 10-second frencher, be grateful for your children and the things you have in your life and be happy that your aren't driving around in a car advertising your love and the powerful nature of felines. Live the life you've imagined."
So, even though when I went upstairs to check on the Ladies last night and found a pile of crayons that had been peeled of their wrappers and a crayon mural on the wall above the Ladies' bed, and even though we were late again to school today, I realized that this is the life I chose. With all my bellyaching and complaining, I am glad to be driving around in a station wagon, littered with a few toys and a couple pairs of the Little Ladies shoes. I am pretty sure I won't be hitting the DMV anytime soon for a personalized license plate that reads BEANPWR, but there are those very small moments of quiet--on a side street covered in snow, or listening to the Ladies sleep where I am reminded of what I have in life--where it seems like a really good idea.
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