Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Happy Holidays

I am sorry I haven't been blogging too much this past week. I have been running around like a crazy person trying to make sure everything is done for Christmas. And by running around I mean I didn't even leave the house on Monday because it was too cold out so I found myself once again at the mall late last night and spending entirely too much money in Target this morning.

At least I almost have everything wrapped!

Just wanted to let you know that I probably won't be posting anything until next week so for those of you who just need your fix--I apologize. We are super busy this weekend so hopefully I will have much to report.

I just wanted to thank you all for reading and for commenting. I appreciate your support.

Have a Very Merry Christmas a Happy New Year and a Happy Holiday Season.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Holiday Shopping Deals

How is it that the holiday's sneak up on me every year? I always think that I am going to have enough time to shop and that on Christmas Eve I will be sitting home making hot chocolate and simmering mulling spices on the stove. But usually I am vying for a parking space and sweating my way through the final push of people. This year I vow to be done by the 2oth.

With the state of the economy we know that people are definitely cutting back, however there are some great deals out there to take advantage of. Online stores are still offering free shipping and guaranteed delivery by Christmas and the stores in the malls seem to be giving things away at drastically reduced prices.

Whatever is still on your list from the Little Tykes Play kitchen to Eddie Bauer trousers (for your husband who doesn't read this blog and has the worst list ever) there are deals out there to be found.

Happy Holiday Hunting.

The Biggest Loser Finale!

Finally! After all the time I have spent watching and writing about the Biggest Loser we have a winner.


Congratulations Michelle! Not only am I super excited it was you and not one of the axis of evil players, but you look fantastic and your transformation was both physical and emotional. Also, your mom looks super hot!


I mean my jaw was just dropping every time another group of players came out. Hello--Phil and Amy! I think Shellay might have been sewn into that dress and her daughter Amy looked amazing. It was so crazy to see how they looked when they got onto the ranch and to see them today. This is why I love the Biggest Loser--the change that happens to people is just insane and you can see them feeling and acting more confident. Check out this link for all the pics of the contestants now.

I will admit to feeling really anxious about the final. When Heba and Ed walked out at the beginning of the show I was shocked. We all know I am not a Heba fan, but she looked great. However, what would have looked more amazing is if she actually wore a bra that supported her rather than just let the ladies hang. She did the same thing in the dress she wore home at the end of the last episode. Heba--when you lose that much weight there is a lot of extra skin and your boobs lose elasticity, please stop by Victoria's Secret, I promise she can help you out.

I loved the fact that Ed got voted into the final by an overwhelming landslide. I think people figured out that he is probably a pretty good guy and deserved to have something for himself. I was kind of annoyed that Heba won the hundred grand I was so hoping it would have been Amy and she could have just proudly rubbed the blue teams face in it. Oh well.

So my two favorite moments on the show were when Jerry came out and when Vicky almost busted her ass walking across the stage. What karma that would have been. I was also glad to see her miss out on beating Ed by one pound. One teeny little pound. Oh Vicky maybe if you hadn't ignored your kids for the three months you were home maybe a higher power could have graced you with that extra pound. Even though she does look good (and I still weigh less then her!) I feel like her obsession with the game play kind of came back and bit her in the ass and I am totally fine with that.

I think that the person who deserved it most won and I am happy for Michelle. Thanks for reading these updates. Only a few short weeks until the new season starts. Did you see that ginormous 19 year old guy? This is going to be good!

Monday, December 15, 2008

Keeping It Together

You may be wondering what the Lady and I have been up to this week.

Here is a small recap.

Wednesday: The Lady took a bath in the cat's water bowl at my parents house.

Thursday: The Lady went to bed at 7:40 because I had a condo meeting at the house and she insisted on coloring all over the papers with a pen. The condo meeting lasted 2.5 hours, twenty minutes of which was spent discussing The Biggest Loser

Friday: We visited the Wild Man for dinner. The two of them played great together, although the Lady was constantly trying to make her way upstairs to look under the bed for the cat. The amount of meowing that happens in this house is incredible.

Saturday: The Lady pooped in the tub and the hot water went out before I could rinse her and the shampoo out of her hair. We had to wait 15 minutes for the water to get hot again and I ended up rinsing her hair with a wet face cloth while she screamed. We also had six kids in our house (which is super small) all under age three. The Lady found a peanut M&M on the floor and I had to fish it out of her mouth with my fingers. Then we went to a Christmas party, where she and her cousin were very, very good and the Lady was super excited to find him the next morning in her room.

Sunday: The Lady and I went to Brooklyn. We had a great time with our "boyfriend" and were very glad we finally got to meet up.

Monday: The Lady and I have no plans. She is finally down for a nap, although I can still hear her talking. I am hoping to finish the afternoon off by running errands and showering.

Three more nights until the backup returns home. If he complains of "exhaustion" I might suffocate him during his nap.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

The Biggest Loser

Sorry for the delay. . . let's get right to it.

Ed, you blew it. Why would you possibly try to throw the weigh in? I get that you are some sort of cuckolded husband, but had you put up a big number and pushed Vicky below the yellow line then America would be voting between her and Heba. And Heba as we all know is the lesser of two evils. So now, the two biggest people left are below the yellow line and we have to listen to you act all selfless and tell everyone to vote for Heba, while we listen to Heba basically use you as a doormat and tout herself. Why Ed? Why?

Having said that I hope Michele wipes the floor with all of them. I hope Vicky takes her smug ass back to Louisiana and gorges on andouille sausage and po' boys and I hope that Ed gets voted into the final and Heba cries in the corner. I also hope that Coleen comes back with the biggest weight loss of those voted off and wins the money.

I will be tuned into the final on Tuesday and until then I will pray that Vicky pulls a hammy.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Waxing Philosophically

I am always looking at other people's eyebrows. I want to see how they maintain them and what shape they take. The difference it makes is real and that is why I implore you all to practice good eyebrow maintenance.

The thing is, I don't actually pay enough attention to my own. I am well aware of the benefits of a well maintained eyebrow and when I do actually get them done, I walk out of that salon feeling like I literally lost 10 pounds, but the reason my brows get so wild; so wild it seems like some mornings Bert isn't just singing on Sesame Street, but staring back at me from my mirror, is because I hate the tweezers.

I have absolutely no problem with the wax. I was on some seriously intimate terms with a Russian woman named Anna and an Ecuadorian woman named Alba for over a year when I was shelling out 60+ bucks a month for the Brazilian. However, things change and as much as I miss their practiced ease at talking to a half naked stranger while pulling hair from every nook and cranny of the area south of the border, I can get similar results at home for less money.

The eyebrows are a different story. I don't want to mess them up and when I get them done professionally I do try to maintain them as well as I can, but every so often you have to go back in to some random salon, lay down on a plastic covered table in some back room and face the tweezers.

I have a little panic attack. The wax is fine, it doesn't feel great but it is bearable, but when that small hand comes at me with its metal tweezers of doom, my stomach starts to hurt. My adrenaline starts to pump and there is no fight only flight. I have to remind myself that I had a baby, that I ran a five mile race, that there are things in life infinitely more painful then a tweezers on your brows, but I panic. I will kick my leg, squirm and yesterday I was crying a little bit and almost puked. I apologized to the girl and believe me I understand that in order for them to finish the look they need to tweeze, but it totally freaks me out and it never seems to go quickly.

I can tweeze my own brows with little difficulty but that takes time and patience and forethought, all of which I seem to lack these days. The $7 salon job is quick but it isn't painless and although I walk out of there relieved and well maintained I am not sure it is worth the absolute panic I endure. Panic that I have never felt about anything else in my life. Tweezers Torture? Who knew?

Day Four and Counting

The Lady and I have been trying to keep busy for the past few days. We were bummed when we missed out on a Brooklyn visit to see our favorite little "boyfriend" but we are hoping he is feeling better.

Made it over to see my parents yesterday and ended up spending most of the day there because the Lady has decided not to nap. I feel partially responsible because I am not keeping her on her regular schedule, but she is always falls asleep in the car for the 25 minute ride and then immediately wakes up and starts meowing once we hit my parents driveway. Apparently that 25 minute nap was enough to keep her going for the rest of the day and she didn't fall asleep again until 4:50 p.m.. Ugh.

We have been trying to keep positive. This morning we went to our first mom's group playdate and it went surprisingly well. Still felt a little unwelcome and kind of ignored but maybe that is just me. The Lady did pretty well for herself and she was the youngest one there.

Our morning didn't start out that great. I made a quick attempt at a shower, which I am proud to say I accomplished. However, when I went to run the water for the Lady's bath there was no hot water. We have had an issue with our hot water heater since we moved in here. We have had the mother board replaced and still it acts up. We usually just reset it when it shuts down. (One time a few weeks into my pregnancy, it shut down. I smelled a little gas but had to drive my sister to the orthodontist. On the way home I called the gas company when I got home the fire department was here, apparently they come when the gas company is super busy!)

This morning was a different story. After 20 minutes of trying to reset the heater, run up and down the stairs to check the water temp and still try to be on time for the playdate, I finally had to give the Lady one step up from the whore's bath and boil water in the kettle to fill the tub. She had no problems with this but I feel like maybe things could go a little easier for me especially when I am shorthanded.

I guess we survived and we both were clean. I would have taken her into the shower with me but she is afraid of it and quite honestly I wanted a couple minutes to myself.

We are hitting another playgroup tomorrow, we will see how it goes.

Friday, December 5, 2008

New Blog

I added a link to a new blog written by my friend Brendan. It is called Gray Matter. Brendan is a stand-up comedian/elementary school gym teacher and I have known him his entire life. He doesn't have much up yet, but keep checking.

Note: There is a warning for adult content on this site so if you are some sort of super prude you might want to skip it.

Stuck in the House and You're to Blame. . .

Darlin' the Lady and I are going insane. . . I always like to start the morning off right with a little Bon Jovi.

So the hubby is gone for the next two weeks. The walls are starting to close in on me already. In all honesty our days will be pretty much the same. I am, however, dreading the 3:30-6 o'clock hours. This is when the Lady turns into some sort of whine machine that is forever clinging to my legs and opening the snack drawer and demanding cookies. I have decided to make as many plans during the day as I can. I will probably get some Christmas shopping done and might spend a night or two at Grandma's, but nothing will really replace the addition of another body in the house, someone who can supervise while I pee.

I am hoping to get a shower in everyday but am not very optimistic. I will use a lot of deodorant and take advantage of nap time. I will also take advantage of every friend, family member and Department Store Santa to fill our time up and keep us occupied. Wish me luck.

Gotta go, the Lady is pantsless and blowing her nose on a dish towel.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Too Tired!

I am tired everyday. I am waiting for the point in my life that I wake up actually refreshed. I am very lucky that the Lady is a good sleeper but it still isn't enough. I caffeinate early to stay refreshed and will admit to sometimes taking a tiny little nap in the afternoon when the Lady is sleeping.

I came across an article in the NY Times about the benefits of coffee vs. napping, and as it turns out napping is the way to go. How I long for the day when the US adopts the practice of siesta, where afternoon (or morning, or evening) napping isn't considered lazy or unproductive but is embraced by all, not just pre-schoolers and college kids.

Just last Saturday I was chatting up a first-time preggo momma-to-be and she said her biggest complaint was fatigue. In between copious swigs of Bud Light I sadly told her that feeling never goes away. The next day I tried to recover from those same giant swills of alcohol and much to my dismay the Lady and I both went sans nap, although I did get in my daily Dunkies fix, and even though some late afternoon time with my napping blanket would have been amazing, the coffee helped enough to get me through the day.

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

So now it is down to four. Vicky actually had a chance to redeem herself in my eyes by actually being as bitchy as she really is. Had she voted for Ed she would have given herself a greater chance of actually winning the whole thing. I guess her commitment to her team says something about her but I am not buying one bit of the softer side of Vicky we saw last night on the program. I think she realizes that it might come down to America voting and if she is below the yellow line--we are not voting for her. I came across an article on Yahoo yesterday about Vicky, which pretty much said the same thing I have been saying since the beginning--that she is a lying, petty, selfish human being. I also think she looked really weird with all that makeup on last night. Talk about too much foundation!

Last night's episode wasn't that exciting. How many times could we watch Tyra "surprise" each contestant with their family member? Although, the visual of Christian Soriano being lifted up by Heba was priceless. That guy weighs like 87.5 pounds soaking wet so it was kind of funny to see him enveloped by a whole lot a woman.

I was sad to see Renee go. I am glad she and Michelle were able to reconnect. I am looking forward to next week. Hopefully, Michelle will stick around she is my pick to win it all.

Run. Run. Run.

So I met my goal. I am hoping that the running will continue and I will be able to run farther and faster.

Novel Writing

I didn't meet the November 30th goal of 50,000 words, but apparently December is National Finish Your Novel Month so I am going to try and take the opportunity to finish the first draft by the end of the month. It seems to be a more attainable goal. I will let you know.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Welcome!!!

I just wanted to officially welcome little ERC to the Loyola family. I am always happy to welcome a new little Lady to the bunch.

I hope mom, dad and big sister KJC are all doing well and adjusting to being a family of four. The pictures are adorable and we can't wait to see you all.

The Holiday Season

I hope that everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving. So here we are in the full Holiday Swing. Not only is it December 1st, but Black Friday has passed us by and Cyber Monday is here today.

I was just wondering if anybody out there actually shopped on Friday, or does anybody do exclusive online ordering only? I am hoping to gather up some coupon codes and links to sales and post them in upcoming weeks.

Please post or e-mail me any shopping tips, coupons or great deals you come upon. The money saving mom is always looking for a deal!

Friday, November 28, 2008

The Turkey Trot

I did it. I ran the Turkey Trot, five whole miles in under one hour.

Granted, I barely slept for two days because I was nervous that I wouldn't be able to do it, but once I started running the adrenaline and the training kicked in. The weather cooperated, if it had rained or been any colder I am not sure how well I would have fared. Also, running the hills last week really helped. It gave me an idea of how the course was and once I made it over that last hill I knew that I could keep going. Mare (by best friend and running partner) stayed together and we had a nice pace going. I don't think I would have been able to even attempt this goal if I didn't have her to run with me.

I will tell you that the last mile was tough and at one point I couldn't figure out why these really fit looking kids in Cross Country uniforms were standing by the side of the course, that is until it dawned on me that these guys had already finished, hadn't actually stopped and in fact had just come back to wait for other people.

With about a half a mile to go we saw Mare's husband and her oldest kid on the side of the course with the camera. Let me tell you that gave me much more motivation then the random cow bell ringers and the bagpipers. When we finally rounded into the straight away we saw her twins, her dad, and her brother (who had also run the race and had finished a good 10-15 minutes before us). Then just a bit beyond them I saw the Lady all bundled up in her pink hat in her carriage with my husband, my dad and my little sister it was then we decided to sprint to the finish. It seemed like a good idea to finish strong, not so much when there was a quick second after we crossed the finish line that I thought I might puke. Luckily that didn't happen, although my sister said that someone had done just that in front of them not too many minutes before we made our way by.



Mare and I on the long stretch to the finish.

I can't remember running that far in a row ever, and now that I know I can do it I feel a little less
inhibited. I feel like I can accomplish goals that I set for myself and that is a good feeling. Will I start training for the NYC Marathon? Probably not, but will I continue to run? Yes, and I hope I can go farther and faster.


I just want to thank my friend Bill for all his advice and support. Thanks Bill!






The Turkey Trotters and the kids. (Yes, all three of those are Mare's)





Happy Thanksgiving

I just wanted to thank you all for reading (and commenting) on my blog. I hope that everybody had a happy and healthy Thanksgiving and are recovering nicely from either their hangover, food coma or too much family time!

The Lady spent her second Thanksgiving at both grandparents, ate primarily crackers and cookies, and spent a large part of the day meowing. She loves making animal sounds.

Just wanted to include two verses of a timeless Turkey Day song (by request). Enjoy.

Happy Happy Turkey Day
Happy Happy Turkey Day
Happy Happy Turkey Day
Happy Turkey Day

Happy Happy Pumpkin Pie
Happy Happy Pumpkin Pie
Happy Happy Pumpkin Pie
Happy Turkey Day

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

Amy, Amy, Amy, I told you so. Hey, I don't like to say it but had you eliminated Vicky last week you would have been saved this week. Granted, maybe you wouldn't have fallen beneath the yellow line, but the black team would have been your ally. You were a bit too naive to even consider trusting that black hearted game player and now you are home with no one to blame but yourself.

We are getting close to the end here. I was so excited to see both Michelle and Renee put up big numbers to stay this week, but unless two more blue fall below the yellow line next week, I think one of them will be leaving.

Not too much excitement this week. It is always good to see Steve Young, but if Vicky told me one more time how much she loves football so she deserves to win everything I think I might have punched the TV. Why is she still around? Why?

The best part about the elimination room was when Ed justified voting for Amy because he is married to Heba. Again, I don't like to stereotype him as some Southern rube, but if the moonshine is wet, well drink it.

The Turkey Trot

The big race is tomorrow and I am getting pretty nervous. I ran the first mile of hills yesterday and I wouldn't say it was easy, but at least we get them out of the way at the beginning. I checked out the rest of the route as well and it seems kind of long but I am hoping that the surge of the 1500 other runners will actually just push me along until I finish.

I was excited to pick up my official number #885 and get my first race t-shirt. The weather is supposed to be pretty good, sunny and in the low 40's. I am just hoping I don't puke, trip, or step in too much goose poo. The Lady and my husband are supposed to meet me at the finish line with big smiles and a camera. I will post the pics and let you know how it goes. Wish me luck!

The Novel

The novel has taken a back seat to life this week. I am over 20,000 words in, but unless some sort of explosion of words happens in the next few days, I don't think I will make the 50,000 by Sunday. I am going to try to get as much done as I can but between Turkey Day, meeting up with friends, a photo shoot on Friday night and celebrating my brother's 30th on Saturday, I might not get a lot of writing done. We will see.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Everybody Loves a Parade?



Yesterday we did something as a family. We hit the downtown Stamford Holiday parade in the freezing cold. The Lady passed out in the car on our way and slept through parking, putting her in the carriage, walking three blocks, the beginning of the parade and a police motorcycle motorcade complete with sirens and lights.



When the first balloon came into site. We woke her up. It took her a minute or two to get adjusted to what she was seeing, but by the time Big Bird made his way down she was waving.




Did I mention it was freezing? We packed it up after Elmo made his way down the road, about an hour into the parade. I figured skipping Santa was no big deal, considering she has no idea who he is. We spent the rest of the day hanging out with my sister who is home from college, then going over to my brother's to watch the Giants. I made some chili, my first attempt. I thought it turned out pretty good. The Lady, however, was feeling the effects of a shortened nap. Little Miss Cranky Pants was not so good. Luckily she went right to sleep when we got home.

Daily Disasters

Here is a photo of the Lady "helping" with the laundry.

I am sitting at home waiting for the cable guy. They are supposed to come between 8 and 11 and if they don't come before 11, I am supposed to call them. We have a pixel problem with the TV where the picture and sound cut out. It is highly annoying. Normally, I wouldn't mind waiting around. The Lady and I have no real plans for the day, however, we are now out of diapers.
The Lady had a two diaper poo. I was premature in going in and changing it. She obviously wasn't done. When I checked the closet for more diapers there were none left, none under the changing table and only one in the diaper bag. She is wearing that sole diaper now, as she roams the house in nothing but it, sticking her finger into baby lotion tasting it and going mmmm. . .
I will dress her before the cable guy comes and try to distract her with some crayons.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Grey's

Is anybody out there watching Grey's Anatomy? Why am I wasting my time watching Izzy have a sexual relationship with her dead fiance that she never even dated outside of the hospital? It is just weird and why aren't those Interns going to jail? Isn't it illegal to perform surgery on someone without passing some sort of test?

Also, where has George been? It looks like he pops in for like three lines each episode. I don't know, I do love the over the top soap operatic behavior of the show but are we jumping the shark here?

One last thing did they seriously do a poop transplant? Look, if you didn't know already you know now, I love poop jokes, but really a poop transplant? Did you see Alex mixing it up on the table? Gross.

Just venting (and procrastinating) if anybody watches feel free to comment.

Procrastination

I am trying to write my novel, but as always I find myself getting up every ten minutes for a glass of water or spotting something that needs to be wiped, picked up, or put away from across the room and have to remedy that situation right away before I can continue.

The novel is coming along. Am I going to get to 50,000 by next Sunday? If I stop blogging and cleaning--maybe. I also have the problem that every once in a while I have to check something on the Internet, it is research really, I will just pull up a fact or check a word definition, but each time I do that I have to stop and check my e-mail, peruse a few top stories and check out what is going on in the world around me. For example the movie Twilight pulled in over 70 mil. this weekend. Yeah to teenage girls and vampire lovers. Even though I always think the book is better than the movie, I also love to see readers who love their books follow them to the box office.

The other bit of news that caught my attention was this article about the space station, Astronauts tinker with urine-to-water machine, yes you read that right. Urine-to-water machine. They drink their own converted pee. Check it out. I thought it was definitely worth a read even though I am a thousand words short of my goal for tonight.

Perhaps some of you read this blog as a bit of procrastination in your own day. I appreciate it

Friday, November 21, 2008

Really Ashlee Simpson? Really?

Ashlee Simpson why? Why did you have to join the long line of celebrity parents who feel that the only way their child can be unique and special is if they have the worst name ever.


I love the birth of a baby. It is awesome and crazy and parenthood is filled with really, really good days and ones you just wish would end. I would like to think that I would never judge Ashlee on her parenting skills because today the Lady watched too much TV and I gave her like 15 hundred crackers. But she named him. . . Bronx Mowgli. WTF?


First of all Bronx? Have you been there lately Ashlee? It is no Brooklyn, an equally ridiculous kid name but one that works much better for the Beckham's than Bronx will work for you. Was he conceived there? And if so, I would actually like to hear that story, but I digress. Here are a few reasons why Bronx is a terrible name for your kid.


1. Nobody says just Bronx when they talk. Everyone says The Bronx. If I stopped someone on the street and said "Where is Yankee Stadium?" Everyone who answered me would say The Bronx. If I asked where Shea Stadium was everyone would just say Queens. It just flat out sounds wrong.


2. Nothing really rhymes with Bronx. When you are a mom you are required to know songs to sing to your kid. You are also required to fit their name into the song wherever possible and if it rhymes all the better. What rhymes with Bronx? Sconce? How many kid songs are about interior decorations Ashlee? How many?

3. Bronx Wentz is hard to say. Repeat it to yourself three times in a row. I guarantee you will get tongue tied. God forbid the kid has a lisp.

4. His middle name is Mowgli. I love the Jungle Book too, but you would have been better off actually naming him Mowgli or just making his middle name Kipling. Why not give him a middle name that is sort of normal so if he decides later in life he doesn't want to go by Bronx, he could at least fall back on his middle name?.

Ashlee, your life is about to change, you have already made one bad parenting decision and I am sure you (like the rest of us) will make many more. So all I can say is good luck to you, Pete and The Bronx.

Other Awful Celebrity Baby Names

Pilot Inspektor
Kal-El Cage
Moxie CrimeFighter Jillette
Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale
Suri Cruise
Hermes (not sure of his last name but his mom is on Gossip Girls)
Apple and Moses Martin

Back to Work?

As you may imagine it is tough being the money saving mom sometimes, especially when you have no money to save. The Bean and The Bear had a paying job this week, which was great. It wasn't the best environment, (inside at 5:30 p.m. with a four year old, a one year old, and a two month old), and even though not everyone cooperated at the same time we got some great shots.

The thing is, I feel like I have been making progress in a lot of my goals so far. The running is coming along and some of the weight is coming off. The novel is at least being looked at, even though it isn't close to 50,000 words yet, and I am writing almost everyday on the blog. The problem is training for a Turkey Trot, writing a novel and blogging doesn't really pull in a giant salary. I think that my Feng Shui might be off. Perhaps the career/finances area of my home is literally my toilet. Anyway, a while ago, I told you that I signed up with a temp agency who places "creative" talent in temp positions. Yesterday, I got my first call.

I always hated starting a new job. The learning curve is always just a pain in the ass. You have to ask a million questions, get people to talk to you, figure out where the bathroom is and how long you can linger at lunch. Being in a temp position has its benefits, the number one benefit is knowing you won't be in that position for long. However, I was nervous this morning walking into the unknown. It is always a bit scary, especially since I haven't worked in an office setting for a long time and because I wasn't familiar with the environment that I would be working in.

So, I arrive a good 10 minutes early and was shown to an empty desk where the proofreader sits. My contact was in a meeting so from 9 to 9:30 I just read over my novel and started to make some changes. At 9:30 someone dropped off a project and hour later I was done. Someone dropped off one more and by 11:30 I had completed all the work they had for me. The minimum amount of hours I had to work was four. So I was guaranteed a half-a-day's worth of work and was to leave at 1 unless they really needed me. What I forgot was how much downtime there is in an office. I didn't have computer access and was grateful that I brought the novel along but I also felt guilty because essentially I was sitting there getting paid to edit my novel. I guess things could be worse.

I left at one, met my husband for lunch and was home in time to hang with the Lady. Getting out of the house was good and it was nice to concentrate on something else besides nap schedules and wrestling small objects out of the Lady's grasp. I am hoping more opportunities come my way not only for the extra income but to help me step out of my comfort zone a bit as well.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Mommy Mind Melt Moment

So the other day the Lady and I went out for our playdate. We left the house at 10:50 a.m. and did not arrive back home until 6:00 p.m., when much to my surprise I found the door about five inches ajar.

Apparently, in the rush to get out of the door with the diaper bag, my gym bag (that also included books 2-4 of the Twilight series for my sister-in-law), and the Lady's lunch bag; not to mention the Lady herself in her puffy and slippery jacket, all the while chatting on the phone, I forgot to pull the door tight behind me.

I called my husband who was leaving work at that time and told him I wasn't going in alone. The Lady and I walked back out to the garage, where she promptly took a header on the driveway and scraped up her face.

Luckily, there was no one hiding in the closets and our TV was still there.

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

WTF? WTF? WTF?

What was Amy C. thinking? Does she really believe that those smug, selfish blue team members are really going to save her if she ever falls below the yellow line? Why Amy C? Why? You had the opportunity to eliminate one of the biggest game players ever, a person who, for the entire week, called you a backstabbing bitch and who hung a REVENGE poster on her door--naming you specifically. A revenge poster! UGH!!!!

Amy--you did something for yourself last week and you had the opportunity to do it again this week. A decision that would help you in the end and would benefit me and the rest of the BL watching community who cannot stand another minute of Vicky or one word that comes out of her mouth. I am pretty sure she said she hated her kids again this week. I might not have gotten that totally verbatim but it was pretty much along those lines.

By voting for Vicky, Amy could have guaranteed herself a few more weeks as long as she didn't fall below the yellow line and she could have guaranteed me a little less anxiety as the numbers start to dwindle and it looks like a Vicky in the final three might happen. Mean people should not win money.

The best part about the whole Vicky/Amy drama is that Vicky said that it was a personal attack against her when Amy voted off Brady. I find that pretty interesting considering that they tried to say that when they voted Amy P. off it had nothing to do with Phil. Hypocrites!

Okay, I am calming down. Let's talk a little about the 80's outfits. Look, I don't like Heba one bit but they showed an overhead shot of her in a leotard and fish net stockings lifting her legs. How embarrassing. There is no way that a crotch shot like that could have gone unnoticed. Dear Lord--please, please, please do not make these people wear anything more revealing until the end of the show where they have actually lost a ton of weight. I kept on waiting for Ed's junk to fly out of his little black shorts. I also couldn't take one word Bob said seriously while he was wearing his "Frankie Says Relax" t-shirt.

Oh, and the breakdancing. When the black team all stood in line and did the wave, I just kept thinking worm, worm, worm, please somebody do the worm. Alas, I was denied that great pleasure but am still trying to erase the images burned into my retinas. I hope those women had some time for a shave or a wax before they had to put on those leotards.

Run. Run. Run.

In a week from tomorrow it is Turkey Trot time. I am feeling better running overall. I still am hovering around the 30 minute mark and I am hoping to push that a little bit this week just to see how I feel. I am excited and nervous at the same time. I will probably not sleep well the night before and I will be praying that there is no rain.

NaNoWriMo

The novel is a little stalled. We are still hovering around the 10,000 word mark and I am hoping to get a few hours in this weekend to lift that and then make a huge push at the end. Time has become my enemy in a lot of things this week. I just don't want to get up early and do anything. I do want to finish this though and it will be a big step in the right direction.

The Scent of God

The Scent of God is permeating my house and my child.

The Scent of God? You ask. Yes, I say.

The Lady got baptized on Sunday. I am aware that she is almost 14 months old and perhaps it would have been a little easier had she been a tiny infant sleeping in my arms, however, that isn't how it happened and she was a very curious toddler in a very pretty dress pointing out the hanging Jesus over the alter and meowing at the statue of Jesus with a lamb by the baptismal fount.

It turned out to be a very nice day and my brother and sister-in-law hosted a lovely little after party at their place, where the Lady had free reign and at one point ran around in nothing but her tights.

The problem is though, she still smells like the Scent of God. The overly fragrant mix of olive oil and perfume that was poured over her head. I will admit I have an overactive sense of smell, I can tell if my husband is wearing a different brand of deodorant and although I appreciate the scents on other people perfume makes me really allergic. More allergic then red wine. I can't stand walking through the entrance to department stores and have been known to hold my breath in a desperate attempt to dodge the overzealous spritzers.

So not only did I have an oily headed toddler running around on Sunday reeking of what I can only describe as "college" and my 19 year old brother as "a head shop," but the scent has lingered on. Obviously she has been bathed, and the diluted woodsy smell emanating off the top of her is quite tolerable now and smells nice. However, every time I enter her room I am hit with the Scent again. It is on her blankets, Jerry and Moonie and her car seat. With the cold weather hitting us hard this week, every time the heat goes on in the house or the car, I am surrounded.

Maybe this is God's way of telling me that he is indeed everywhere or maybe it is time for me to wash the sheets.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

I Am. . .

Beyonce has a new album out. I love the "If I Were a Boy" song and am endlessly searching for it on the radio when we are in the car. The name of her album is I Am. . . Sasha Fierce. She has created an alternate personality by the name of Sasha Fierce who is the performer, the sexy side of her, the one who takes the risks and wears leotards in her music videos. I am not sure if she is the same person who wears white bathing suits with gold jewelry in the South of France or if that is Beyonce herself, but regardless she is a force to be reckoned with.

I am thinking of adopting a new moniker of my own. Forget Bean, I want something powerful, something kick ass, an alter ego that is assertive, outgoing and not afraid to talk to other moms. I was thinking something like Rouge Firecrotch.

Apparently men love the color red, and find women more attractive when they are wearing it. Step one would be to fill my closet with all things red and go from there. Now, Firecrotch might be misleading. I am for one thing, not a red head, not Lindsay Lohan and not suffering from a scorching case of herpes. I chose it because it represents female power and when it burns down there you know there is trouble coming. I also think that this could very easily translate into a superpower name, next years Halloween costume or my new porn name. Either way it is representation of the other me, the strong, powerful, risk taker lurking beneath acne prone skin and a belly pooch. I think I am going to start referring to myself in the third person as Rouge Firecrotch a la Suede from this seasons Project Runway.

I would love to hear some of your own alter ego names. Seriously, it won't kill you to make something up and post it in the comments section. . .

Baby Steps

The Lady and I have plans for a pretty busy week. Yesterday we had a play date with a friend of mine from High School, who I reconnected with via. . . you guessed it. . . Facebook. Ahh the power of that website never ceases to amaze me. We had a really good time and the Lady got along well with her new friend, who was super cute and tried to sit on the Lady's lap, which was very funny.

I had high hopes going into today. I RSVP'd to a Mom's Group Evite for playtime at Kids U. I wasn't really sure how it worked, but I knew for $5 the Lady would be able to play for up to two hours and I was hoping to meet some of the women in the group. I was at least hoping to meet the main mom organizer and introduce myself. High hopes indeed. We got there took off our shoes and the Lady was off. We smiled meekly at some other moms, we said excuse me when we got in the way, we had a brief exchange with one mom but that was all. No introductions, no real small talk and not even one "How old is she?" I saw two other moms introduce themselves and chat for almost the whole time, while the Lady and I dodged their kids and literally stepped into the middle of their conversation. Oh well. Next time I am going to take a little risk and try to talk to one mom. We will see how it goes. I am also going to try to go to the 0-2 play date next week, which is at someones house. I figure they have to talk to me there, right?

I am thinking of practicing "approachable" looks in the mirror. Maybe I come off aloof or uninterested, maybe my smile is insincere, maybe the pimple on my face is too grotesque to look at, or maybe they are put off by the cuteness factor of the Lady and are so stunned by such an adorable face they are scared to talk to us. Or maybe they are put off by the fact that the Lady is covered in cuts on her face after a manicure mishap and a header into the driveway. So what if her nose and upper lip are a bit chaffed the girl just wants to play and I just want to talk to one other adult during the day.

Tomorrow is story time at Barnes and Noble. We will soldier on.

Friday, November 14, 2008

The Constitution State

I have been a resident of Connecticut for almost five years. I still have a hard time telling people that. It isn't that I don't like the community in which I live or that I don't see myself settling permanently here in the future, it is just that it is well. . . Connecticut. It seems to be just a halfway point between New York and Boston, a collection of towns with hedge fund money and closets full of pastels and popped collars.

When travelling my husband still tells people he is from New York. When I tell people I am from Connecticut the word sounds foreign coming from my lips (it is actually based on Mohegan and Algonquin Indian words for a "place beside a long river"). Granted we live in essentially a suburb of New York City and the fact that we are a quick train ride away and the actual New York border is like 7 miles from here, does a lot to ease my mind.

This week though, I am proud to be from Connecticut because here we welcome everyone. It is now legal for Gays and Lesbians to marry in the Constitution State. We join our neighbors in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts in recognizing same sex marriage as legal. I say if you want to get married--get married. I mean marriage isn't always easy and why should anybody be denied the opportunity to argue over cleaning the bathroom and what is for dinner while at the same time having access to health benefits and the knowledge that their relationship is seen as equal to heterosexual couples in the eyes of the law?

So, even though I still miss my New York State License I am glad to be living in a State that allows people to live and love how and who they want.

A few little known CT facts:

Connecticut never ratified the 18th Amendment (Prohibition). However you cannot buy beers here after 9 p.m. and you can't buy them on Sunday. This is kind of hard sometimes considering I spent my teen years buying beers at gas stations.

The Scoville Memorial Library is the United States oldest public library. Yeah--we like reading.

Connecticut is home to the first hamburger (1895), Polaroid camera (1934), helicopter (1939), and color television (1948). What would we do without color TV?

PEZ® Candy is made in the city of Orange. Who doesn't love the chalky taste of PEZ in their mouth?

The Wiffle Ball factory is in Shelton, CT. I think everyone owes a bit of thanks for this particular invention. Childhood would not be the same without the wiffle ball.

There is a town in CT called Mianus. Yes, Mianus, and a car dealership called Karl's that has a sign on 95 that says "Hummer by Karl."

I am learning to love this State a little bit more everyday.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

I Promised

I know I promised that I would write more then just the BL update and info about my running but the pickings are slim today.

I don't have much except to tell you that I bought crayons for the Lady because she shows entirely too much interest in the writing utensils I use and instead of coloring on the paper I set out for her she tried to eat the crayon and then threw it in the trash.

I am trying to give her things to do so that she can play on her own, however, the only thing that seems to distract her these days is the 1-800-Empire commercials.

800-588-2300 Empiiiire

Try to get that out of your head people. It is an insidious jingle designed to penetrate every nook and cranny of your brain and joins the list of other commercials that have been circulating in my head for months now with no end in sight.

They include:

IO Digital Cable (For all of you Tri-State area people with Cablevision you know what I am talking about) and the "Saved By Zeros" commercial that has run at every single commercial break in every single sporting event that I have watched this year. These are right up there with the Egg song from Sesame Street, Frogs do it. . .

Yeah, like I said, slim pickings today!

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

I almost turned the TV off last night. I almost walked away from a program that I have devoted countless hours to, that I have written about, talked about and have credited to helping kick start my own fitness journey.

I couldn't bear it. I could not bear the blue team. I could not bear the obvious and malicious nature of the Queen Bitch Vicky. I couldn't stand to watch Heba run and jump into the arms of her husband, who (and I apologize to any Southern readers) looks and sounds like he has a kissing cousin somewhere in the back hills of Appalachia.

I don't understand how when Vicky says something pointed and mean that it is okay, but when Phil came down to ask for an apology, Heba screams that he is playing the victim. Look, I am done with Phil. As far as I am concerned he dug his own grave in this game, plus he should have tried to kick ass in the challenge and instead he just gave up, but give me a break, these women are manipulative and overly aggressive. I wonder what demons they have been stuffing down their throats for so long.

Anyway, kudos to Stacey on the green team for trying so hard to get back on the show. But really she couldn't just do another 13 steps? Come on Stacey, you really could have made me happy last night. And what was with all the tears at the beginning? You were on the ranch for a week. Why so weepy now?

So when Ed won, it really got my Irish up. I was angry. I had a physical reaction to it, like I was personally affected by this outcome, like if I saw Vicky on the street I might punch her in the baby maker.

I wasn't sure I could continue as a faithful watcher when I didn't want any of the blue team to succeed, then came the weigh in.

Amy C. I would like to give you a ten second frencher for not only growing a set and raging against the blue machine, but for playing this game for yourself. Will you be eliminated next week if you fall below the line? Possibly. But you broke up part of the "five blue strong" and restored hope to an entire audience including one woman who spends entirely too much time thinking about you and your television program.

I will close this BL recap by saying that Brady looks good and he looks like an attentive father. It is hard to feel happy for him when I am filled with a venomous hatred for his wife, but he seems to be reaching his weight loss goals and if he can pass that on to his children then that is a good thing. I also have to say that his wife might be effing crazy. Mental illness is not something to joke about, but that bitch is nuts. Until next week my BL loving friends. . .

RUN. RUN. RUN.

I am getting there. I am a little behind in terms of meeting my distance goals. I wanted to be running a consistent 3 miles everyday this week, but am hitting a wall around 2.5. That is only half of the Turkey Trot and although part of me hopes that adrenaline and the desire to avoid embarrassment will help me push through the five miles, I realize that without consistently running at least 3-3.5 miles I will have a very long morning. I have to remember that half of this is a mental game and that if I just stopped paying so much attention to the time/distance issue I might actually be able to enjoy the run. By the way, I wouldn't recommend running outside past your local recycling center and waste treatment center. Yes, it is the path to the nice area of town but it doesn't smell good at all.

National Novel Writing Month

I am up to 6909. I have been there since Friday. I haven't written one word since. My plan to get some time in last night backfired because the hubby didn't make it home until 7:30 and God forbid I miss the BL. Nap time today is writing time. My goal is to get to 10,000 by the end of today.

Don't Miss Top Chef

Top Chef is on tonight on Bravo. Check it out.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I know, I know. . .

I have been a terrible blogger this week and I apologize. I am very quickly losing all motivation to do anything. Maybe it was the time change and the fact that once it hits four o'clock in the afternoon all I want to do is crawl into my bed and take a nice long nap, interrupted only by Oprah and some TLC.

I have also been kind of slacking in the good mothering category. As I type this the Lady is sleeping in her crib. It is 5:30 in the afternoon. Needless to say we didn't get our usual nap in today and that was my fault. I did have a photo session this morning and then in the afternoon took advantage of the holiday and got to the gym. I know I should wake her up or she will be awake until 10 o'clock tonight but I still haven't decided on dinner and I feel I owe my readers something this week!

Okay, okay, I will get her up in five minutes. Then I will throw some soup in a bowl, defrost some bread wait for my husband to get home, have him deal with dinner and the reinvigorated Lady and I will go take a shower and try to get my word count up on the novel.

For all those Veterans out there, thank you. I hope everyone else is having a good day and I promise I will write something vaguely interesting tomorrow that isn't just about the BL and my very sorry and pathetic attempt to run 5 miles.

Toodles.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Victoria Tell Me Your Secret

I went bra shopping the other day. The Lady and I wheeled our way into Victoria's Secret and looked around. I haven't bought a new bra since before the Lady was born, when my already ample bosom started to blossom a bit more and I purchased three bras from Macy's.


I wore those three bras, and then an additional two nursing bras pretty regularly for months. I am always reading that most women are wearing the wrong size bra. I am also reading that the shelf-life for these contraptions are only about 3-4 months. 3-4 months? I have bras in my drawer from like 5 years ago, granted they are of the lacy, frilly nature that I probably don't really fit in, are kind of scratchy, and are designed more for their visual punch then actual comfort, and I rarely wear them.

I decided to be measured and, once and for all, find a bra that lifts, separates, smooths, and minimizes all types of back fat and overspill. The very nice saleslady informed me that this was her third day working at VS and her first time measuring anyone. Great. I slid out of my fleece and stood open armed in my little grey tank top, grateful that I had actually showered and shaved that morning, as the woman measured away. I have what could be described as a broad back. I probably could have been a really good swimmer or a starter on the Giants offensive line. I guess we all have our cross to bear.

I had two bras in my hand, same bra, different size. One of them fit the measurement that the woman gave me, one of them fit the measurement of the bra I was wearing. I am not sure if the girl saw that I had two bras or not, but she handed me a padded bra to try on. Why would you hand a D-cup a padded bra? I am looking for support, not Dolly Parton like exposure. Plus it was super frilly and lacy and totally inappropriate for anything but a quick strip tease or an anniversary.

So I am in the big dressing room with the Lady in her jog stroller. We have maneuvered our way into a tight corner and once again I find myself in a dressing room that is like 500 degrees. I know this is gross, but I literally had to wipe my boob sweat with my tank top and let the girls hang loose a bit before I dare tried anything on.

First I tried the lacy, padded bra. Um. . . not so much.

Then I tried on the bra in the size the woman told me I was. Also, not quite right.

Finally I tried on the same bra in the size I came in wearing and . . . I am not sure how to describe the bio-fit by Victoria Secret. The closest I can come to verbalizing it is by saying that it felt like a hug from Jesus. It felt like Jesus enveloped me with comfort and understanding. A welcoming embrace that spoke "Girls, let me carry your burden a bit."

Oh ladies welcome home.

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

So, obviously the Biggest Loser wasn't on due to election coverage. Although it does seem like the Republicans could probably take the title of Biggest Loser this week.

Whatever your political leanings, it was a historic election and hopefully we will be moving forward come January.

Now, bring back the BL for next week. I need my fix.

Other Updates

I slacked a bit last week with the running, but got outside yesterday and did pretty well. I am not sure how I am going to handle the hills but I will work towards that this week. I am still seeking appropriate workout gear. It is embarrassing to try and hitch up your pants every 25 yards.

The novel has on 3001 words so far. I am hoping to get a bit more time today to get the word count higher. It is a little freeing to know that I don't have to toil over each word and sentence. Some of it is totally working, some of the stuff is cringe worthy. Edit. Edit. Edit. That is what it is all about.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

I Rocked the Vote

The Lady and I just got back from the polls. It is beautiful out. We made a quick Dunkies run (I know, but I haven't been there in like a week and a half and there was the possibility that I would have to buy the Lady's silence with a glazed munchkin) and then walked to the school behind our house to vote.

There was a line. There was also a woman loudly complaining about the line. I am not a fan of people who try to draw attention to themselves in public places, unless they are saying something hilarious. I also don't like when people lead you in conversations so that you have to respond by asking them a follow up question. Case in point:

How are you? (Everyone knows you just answer this by saying OK or fine or good, you don't actually answer it)

Good, but I am not sure about my daughter/father/dog/fish, etc. . .

Ugh. Polite follow-up question.

Sorry, that was a little tangent but just wanted to point out one of my pet peeves.

Anyway, we were anticipating a wait today, so I tried to go a little later in the morning to avoid the rush of people who actually work. The process from start to finish only took 21 minutes. I did have to appease the Lady with half a munchkin and the Wet Ones container but I felt good about getting out and voting. I feel good about getting out of the house period, but to have a goal always makes it more satisfying.

I encourage you all to get out and vote, regardless of your candidate of choice. Also, grab a "I Voted" sticker and head to either Krispy Kreme or Starbucks (for those of you on the dark side), they are handing out freebies for those who voted.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Panda Man



Panda Man.

Many thanks to Steadman's Army for giving us a photo of his very cute little guy.





Sunday, November 2, 2008

Where is the Remote?

I didn't want to accept it but I think the Lady might have thrown away our remote control. Granted, it is the TV remote that only controls the volume and not the actual channel changing. The power button had also been rendered useless by her chewing on the end of it too many times, but it still worked.

Initially, I wanted to blame my husband. The Lady and I were gone all last weekend and for most of the day on Monday so we really didn't have any access to the remote control. He was certainly the last one to use it, but after pulling out the couches, checking all the drawers and nooks and cranny's in the Lady's sight line and witnessing her throw a spoon and a cell phone into the trash yesterday, I am thinking that our alternate explanation of Gremlins in the house probably isn't valid.

I am hoping it will turn up one day so that I don't have to walk the two feet from the couch to the TV to adjust the volume, but I am not holding my breath.

Halloween III


Brother John and Sister Mary Margaret


Juno gets her drink on
Juno's baby daddy, Sister Mary Margaret and the Joker

Okay, so I know there might be a few too many pics up, but these are from the adult party. Did I mention that I am too old to stay up until 3 am?

We had a really good time and it was nice to get out and socialize. Was it sad that all my adult conversations took place with me wearing a monks wig? Yes, but at least I wasn't wearing a Super Mario mustache. Hope everyone had a good weekend.










Friday, October 31, 2008

More Halloween



I couldn't resist.



Happy Halloween



Happy Halloween! This is our pumpkin. My husband did a good job carving. I, of course, had to clean the whole thing out. I did make toasted pumpkin seeds though and they are pretty tasty.




The Lady as a fairy. She forgot her wand at my husband's office so this isn't the full picture. I decided to forgo the crown, due to the fact that it would last a good three seconds on her head.



The Wild Man as a puppy.




The Lady.

If anybody wants to send some photos of their kids (or themselves) in their Halloween outfits, I would love to post them.

Just e-mail me the attachment at thethreebeansalad@gmail.com, please provide a pseudonym for privacy or I will be forced to make one up.
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National Novel Writing Month

November is National Novel Writing Month. I have decided to finish my novel. Is this a crazy idea? Yes. Why? Well, because not only am I training for a five mile race, I live with a toddler and her nap time is my only time to keep up on personal hygiene.

However, I made a list of goals at the beginning of the year to try and accomplish. When I started this blog, the only thing crossed off that list was a new car for my husband. But since I have started I have been able to work towards at least three of those things, including getting off the baby pounds, building up my portfolio, and budgeting better. I figure if I am held accountable to myself (and to my readers) that I will kind of just have to make the time to write more. Will I blog as much this month? Maybe not, (or maybe I will try every distraction known to man to avoid the behemoth that is 50,000 words.) Will this be a good novel? No. It will be the bare bones of the novel I am working on. The novel that has about 75 pages and no direction, the novel that needs to be written from a different perspective and with a more defined plot. Will I finish this? I hope so. Rewriting for me is the easy part, so even if I have 45,000 words that stink hopefully I can build off that 5,000 that work and finally, finally, finally get this crossed off my list.

NaNoWriMo starts tomorrow. Anybody out there game?

One of Those Weeks

I am ready for this week to end. We just had one of those weeks that started off well and then seemed like a slow crawl towards the finish.

On Wednesday the Lady had her second flu shot. We sat happily in the waiting room for almost fifteen minutes for a fifteen second shot, followed by five full minutes of big fat tears. We usually go to story time on Wednesday to break up the day a bit, but we blew it off. I am kind of regretting that decision because the Lady only ended up taking a little over an hour nap for the entire day, threw baking and cooking utensils in the bathtub and to top it off ate pasta out of the garbage. The pasta thing was my bad. I had taken the garbage bag out of the pail and left it on the kitchen floor. I will tell you that the pasta was on the very top and had been made that day, so at least it wasn't old dirty pasta from the bottom of the bag.

I am worried about winter. If we are stuck in this house all day I don't think it will be good for either of us. Since, the money saving mom has opted out of her daily Dunkies run we don't even get that twenty minutes out in the morning anymore. Mom's Group--here we come.

Today is Halloween. The costume is finished and we are planning on getting the picture taken this afternoon. I will post photos later today. My husband and I are going to a little get together this evening sans the Lady. We have no idea what we are going to be. For the last three nights we have stayed up entirely too late talking about this. As of yesterday evening, we were going as the Super Mario Brothers. Yeah--I know. Apparently two guys at the hubby's office were going as that and he thought it would be easy. He was right it would be super easy if either one of us had overalls, white gloves, or mustaches.

I got a call from him from Party City this morning. They are out of overalls and hands. We may be going as the Spartan Cheerleaders from SNL. I will post those photos too.

I am just waiting for this morning to end. The Lady got up a full hour early and proceeded to crank pants her way through the day. Granted, one of her molars just poked through so she is probably uncomfortable, but that is no reason for her to pull a poo diaper out from underneath her while I am trying to change her and toss it backwards over her head, then in my attempt to gather all the goods, toddle out of her room nudie and pee on the living room floor.

Oh, the daily disasters.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

Let's be perfectly clear here. Brady and Vicky totally threw last weeks weigh in to get Amy P. off the show and when Bob tried to call them out on it, Vicky lied to his face because she is a cunning, vindictive bitch leg. She is also in the words of Bob "Shakespearean." I only have to add to that "Out, damn'd spot! out, I say!" It looks like next week they are going to singles and I can only hope that Renee or Michelle is the biggest loser of the week so they can try to get either Vicky or Heba off the show.

Speaking of Heba, all I can say is SHUT YOUR MOUTH! The drama that follows that girl around is ridiculous and Phil was right, she tries to mug it up for the camera. Did you see her run up on the stage when Brady dropped that 13lbs? Stop being a camera whore and stop talking. When she confronted Phil in the dining room and started saying that he was saying hateful things about her, which she would never say about him, and then called him a sneaky snake in the grass, I thought that was a little hypocritical. She also tries to profess that the show is about being healthy and losing weight, when she has clearly aligned herself with a couple intent on playing the game to their best ability. Oh, I can't wait until she gets kicked off or confronted.

Phil--you screwed yourself. You should have opened your mouth the week of the temptation challenge and you never would have been separated from your beloved Amy. Then, you should have closed your mouth before saying anything to Brady. Also, you might try growing a pair, because even though I am still routing for you and Amy, you seem a bit weak. I will admit you do look 10 years younger with your head shaved and your super trendy goatee. Good luck to you.

Stay tuned, next week looks good.

Also, Oprah is doing a show on the Biggest Loser tomorrow--set your DVR/Tivo and we will see how past contestants look today.


Updates

I fell hard off the food journal wagon this weekend, but pizza and beers are so yummy! I am still trying to get to 25-30 minutes of running in a row by the end of this week. I got to 18 yesterday and am hoping to add 2-3 minutes per day so by November 1st I will be able to run at a consistant pace for at least three miles. Race day is fast approaching and I just want to be prepared.

Blogtastic!

I just wanted to let you know that my friend Bill is blogging now. He is the one who actually comments on this blog--and for that I am totally grateful because it makes me feel like someone is actually out there reading!

Here is the link to his blog http://nocynicsallowed.wordpress.com/

Check it out if you get a chance. I also linked to it in the "Things I Like" section of my blog for easy access.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Weekend Wrap Up and a Few Minor Musings

Posted by PicasaBABIES!
I feel like this week has totally gotten away from me. Our weekend was busy and a lot of fun. I always enjoy hanging with the fam and the Lady had a great time with her cousins. I have yet to come up with clever pseudonyms for the two guys on the ends, but starting with the second from the left we have the Wild Man, Bunny and the Lady. This isn't the best picture of them but it is the only one where they are all together. The Halloween costume shot kind of got away from us. It is hard to coordinate five 9-15 month olds schedules.
I had to cut the weekend short and head back home for a wedding. The bride was beautiful, but when the DJ started handing out leather jackets and sunglasses for the "Summer Lovin'" sequence, I was ready to go. The $12.65 dress served its purpose, but I spent half the night wearing my husband's jacket because it was freezing in there. I think I am too old to dance at weddings of people I don't really know, plus I didn't have enough drinks in me. I also will admit to repainting only the first three toes on each foot, because they were the only ones showing. Pretty pathetic, but I didn't have time for a mani-pedi. What is even sadder is that the polish on my toes was from my vacay to CA in the beginning of September. The money saving mom has to cut corners somewhere, and if I didn't develop some sort of palsy while trying to paint my own nails, perhaps they would come out looking good. Thank goodness it isn't flip flop weather anymore.
On Monday I got down to Jersey to see a brand new little lady. She is super cute and super tiny with a shock of black hair that is just adorable. I got to see two of my Loyola mommas and their six kids combined.
Friday is Halloween and we are going to a costume party at my brother and sister-in-law's place. I have no idea what to be.
I have to give a shout out to Steadman's Army here and let him know I was considering the Diane Lane and Richard Gere characters from "Nights In Rodanthe," but I was afraid that we wouldn't be the only ones going as them. I really want to pick something that isn't so obvious!
Any Halloween suggestions would help. Post your favorites so I can steal all your good ideas. Thanks!

Friday, October 24, 2008

Consumer Safety

My sister is an International Product Liability lawyer, which means she is up on product recalls. It also means that I will never, ever, ever go on a jet ski again.

Just wanted to post the link to the Consumer Product Safety Commision for those of you who don't already have it. You can sign up for e-mail updates for anything related to baby products or toys. It is a good mom resource. I am also posting a link to a product liability blog--just in case you have nothing else to do with your day.

http://www.productliabilitylawblog.com/2008/10/

Weekend Plans

My mom came over yesterday and after finally figuring out how to use the sewing machine we started on the woodland fairy tutu. I will post a photo in a few days because my mom took it to hand sew some ribbon detail. I think it looks super cute even though the Lady might not wear it for more then thirty seconds. We will see.

We have a busy weekend planned. The Lady and I are on our way up to New London for a weekend with my favorite girls and their assorted brood. We are waiting to hear about the sex of the baby in Bunny's Mom's belly. Think pink everyone!

I am then leaving the Lady with the Wild Man and coming back down for a wedding on Saturday night. I scoured my closet for something to wear that not only fit but was fall wedding appropriate and found nothing. However, a few pairs of old pants now fit, which is good because I can now wear more then just sweatpants and my stretch jeans. I didn't want to go out and buy something new for the wedding because I am trying to be the money saving mom and because in all actuality I will probably not wear the dress again this year. It soon became apparent that I needed something so I headed out to the mall. I hit Ann Taylor Loft and found a dress that ended up being $12.65. It isn't super fancy but I am going to dress it up with some pearls and a nice shoe.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Windy Walk

The weather is getting colder but today was sunny and bright and I decided to make the effort to get to story time at Barnes and Noble. The wind was totally whipping and I figured that if I threw the rain cover over the stroller that it would cut down on some of the chill for the Lady.

The rain cover I have fits my regular stroller, we walk with the jogger because there are bumpy sidewalks and it is fully assembled and waiting for us in the garage. I figured I would just wing it and make do with what we had. The minute I put that thing over the stroller the Lady lost it. She was scared and started crying those big tears that just roll down her face and stop in the middle of her cheeks and stay there for like ten minutes after she has stopped crying. I made some faces at her through the baby bubble, wrapped her tight in a blanket and we took off.

The bubble baby and I made it to Barnes and Noble and this week the place was packed. There had to be at least twenty kids. The Lady stayed in the stroller at first, to avoid knocking down smaller children while pretending she was a pachyderm. The girl reading this week was much better than the woman last week, although I was highly distracted by her boob salad. I mean this woman works in the kids section and to say it was sloppy would be an understatement. Anyway, she read a wide variety of Halloween books and when it was done the Lady and I stayed around and read some books and guess what? A mom talked to me.

I was super surprised. Granted she was European so maybe she has better mom manners then some of the other ladies I saw today. She introduced me to her son (but like in other situations we never introduced ourselves to each other) and even though she was very nice I think she kind of insulted me when I told her how old the Lady was. Like most people she said something like "oh wow, she is so big" then I said something like my husband is tall blah, blah, blah. Then she asked if she was my first because according to her, most first born kids are usually much smaller then those down the line. I mean what do you say to that? I have to disagree. She is my first born but look at her, it is so obvious she is a giant baby and all the rest of them will be, according to you, even more ginourmous. Why genetics? Why? Or you could just smile and nod, which is what I usually do.

I will admit that the Lady is tall. There was a little girl who was saying sentences who was about the same size the Lady was at eight months. But I am not going to worry about it, she is who she is.

So we finally leave B&N. I even made a concerted effort to stop and say goodbye to the European momma before we left. On the way home the wind picked up and whipped off my rain cover. It blew into the busy road we were walking along and I watched helplessly as three cars ran it over. I wasn't sure what to do. I tried to chase it into the street but I didn't want to leave the Lady (who had already pulled off her hat), or get hit by a car. A woman walking by feigned interest but really had nothing for me. The Lady just sat in her stroller getting wind whipped while I darted cautiously into oncoming traffic.

Luckily, the cover made its way close to the sidewalk but it was still about 15 yards away. Thankfully, a very nice man ran across traffic, picked it up, handed it back to me and told me to have a nice day. I reattached as well as I could, keeping one piece in my hand and headed home. The Lady seemed non-plussed and eventually passed out protected from the wind. Oh, the things you have to go through just to get out of the house.

The Biggest Loser and Other Updates

I have only a few things to say about last night's episode. The first is a repeat refrain from a few weeks ago. It goes a little something like this:

Vicky you're a huge bitch
huge bitch, huge bitch
Vicky you're a huge bitch
I hate you.

The second is a new verse to that song. It goes a little something like this:

Heba shut your fat mouth
fat mouth, fat mouth
Heba shut your fat mouth
I hate you.

I try not to be a negative person, but Vicky your scrunchy, smarmy, snarky face makes me hate you with a venomous passion that might only be diminished by your exit from the show.

I could not believe that she said she didn't care about seeing her kids on video. She basically said, I am a huge selfish bitch who is only after the money, the weight loss is secondary and so is my family.

Vicky, I hope Brady wins the biggest loser, divorces you and takes all that money, then marries a fitness trainer with a sick bod, who is not only beautiful on the outside--she is something you will never be--beautiful on the inside. Oh, and I hope you gain back all the weight you lose and spend the rest of your days in a shame spiral full of fried chicken and the dollar menu from Micky D's.

Well I feel better.

I was sad to see Amy P. go but it was pretty obvious she was on the chopping block. Hopefully Phil works it out and makes it to the final.

Updates

I am running for a longer period of time and hope to not only increase my time but my distance as well. My goal is to get to three miles (non-stop) by the end of this month and then just add distance from there.

It got really cold here this week and I haven't run outside since the weather changed. I definitely need a couple of new workout pants because mine just keep falling down and it is kind of hard to run while hitching up your pants for three miles. My goal is to get back outside tomorrow and see how it goes.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Words for the Wise

I was giving the Lady a bath the other day when I realized that a layer of icky grossness had formed inside the little rubber ducks we play with. Apparently you are supposed to squeeze out all the water after each bath, not just let them roll towards the drain still full of water to wait it out until the next aquatic adventure. When I started to squeeze out the water it was accompanied by thin strips of slime, the likes of which I have not seen since the bathtub in my brother's college apartment. (A slime problem so disgusting that they didn't actually use the tub and just showered in the locker room at the athletic facility).

I never realized that without a vigilant eye on these rubber ducks that a mold problem could occur. I would also recommend, and this might fall under the heading of a mommy mind melt, that when trying to clean these rubber ducks, you don't actually squirt it in the general direction of your face. This would avoid not only a wet visage and having to change your shirt, but also would avoid having to wipe a piece of this slick slime off your upper lip.

The Money Saving Mom Makes Coffee

We went to Costco the other day. I would recommend not showing up at four o'clock on a Sunday, the place is packed! Granted we would have gone earlier, but the Giants were on and even I wasn't going to miss that for 20 pound bags of frozen chicken.

It was so crowded that I didn't even get any samples and at one of the stations they were giving away Halloween candy! Anyway, we got in and out fairly quickly and didn't get anything that wasn't on our list. This of course included a 2.5lb bag of Dunkies coffee that makes 135 cups.

The reason I pay $2.45 for an iced coffee is because it is delightfully delicious and it tastes the same every time. I have come to the realization that sometimes convenience is worth the money because I cannot make a good cup of coffee, there is entirely too much math involved. The instructions say one rounded tablespoon for every 6 oz of water, but the water is measured in 8 oz and the Dunkies bag recommends upping the scoopage to 1 1/2 scoops. Needless to say, I was thrown off by the complicated counting and just poured in 8 scoops of coffee and 10 cups of water. What I ended up with was the darkest, strongest coffee ever. I get my coffee with x-tra, x-tra skim, so I like it light anyway, but I had to use like a cup and a half of milk in order to make this drinkable. However, in the spirit of being the money saving mom, I took the rest of the coffee threw it in the fridge poured it over ice this morning, diluted it with as much milk as possible and am slowly sipping it as we speak. Sometimes any coffee is good coffee.