Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Holiday Pics

The Lady at her concert. Note the bar behind them, about ten minutes after this was taken, as they were all sitting down, the Lady slammed her head on it and spent the rest of the concert singing the songs from her father's lap.


The Lady, The Little Lady and the Big Guy after their sleepover.

Decorating the tree. I made her put this robe on so that I could have some photos of her clothed.

The Little Lady loves to decorate.

The angel on top of our tree.

In Brooklyn for our playdate. Have to love the 6 ladies and one little man!

The Night Before Christmas. I couldn't resist, I mean really, look at the Little Lady's face

Santa brings the Lelli Kellys!!!

Iron man and the Lady at my in-laws.

Happy Third Birthday Wild Man!

Seriously Little Lady? I spent 10 minutes opening that box so you could play with the Little People inside and instead you feel the need to actually play inside the box?

Snowed In!

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Happy Birthday To the Wild Man!

Just want to wish the Wild Man a very Happy Birthday! I hope that he is enjoying all his new toys and not driving his parents crazy as we all bunker down in this blizzard!

Love you Wild Man!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Ringing O' the Bells

Waiting very patiently to leave the office to see the Lady at her Bell Ringing Christmas Concert. Can't wait to see her perform all the songs I have heard her singing for the past couple of weeks.

The best part. . . the hubby will be there to meet me!!! Finally, the Toy has come back to Connecticut.

I will say the school thinks of everything, they had print outs of the church hanging in the hallways so you could see what side your kids class would be performing on and where you should sit. Will try to post a pic later today, not sure how good it will be considering the Lady had to get a bath this morning and her hair was totally matted down from her hat when we got to school. Why can't we just get it together? On a positive note, she is clean and she is wearing clean undies. That is a win-win in my book.

Don't have to come back to work after the show, the office is having some sort of kick-ball tournament/Holiday party today. Guess the Ladies and I will hang while my husband naps. He has two hours, two hours, and then I am leaving the house until bedtime. Missed that guy.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Thank You. Thank You.

Just wanted to thank all my friends and family who have helped me out this past week or so, or who have offered a word or two of support.

I am incredibly grateful for the sleepover invite from the Wild Man and the Wild Woman. Although everyone went to bed a little too late, and the Little Ladies woke up entirely too early, and the big kids got a little bit overexcited with the Christmas crafts (you should have seen the gingerbread train--it was covered in candy and by no means would be edible after the Lady was licking the peppermints before sticking them into the frosting), we had a great time and it was a good way to end the week.

We also had a sleepover at our house and the added benefit of attending a Christmas Party. Many thanks to my cousin for coming and staying with us. I was super excited the kids got along and was even more excited that we got a chance to catch-up.

Many more thanks to my SIL for coming over two Sunday's in a row and watching the Ladies so I could run out to the store. As an added bonus she helped clean up, which is always a plus and this was after the Ladies found a bottle of baby powder in the beach bag in the closet and doused themselves with it.

I think the festivities wore out the Ladies and for the past two nights they have both been in bed and sleeping before their usual bedtimes, leaving me with an actual hour or two to myself. So thank you, my beautiful Ladies. Although, last night the Lady woke up at 2:30 in the morning and ended up in my bed where she tossed and turned for a while and where I am pretty sure she asked me to cut her toenail at 3:40am. I wasn't sure if I was dreaming it, but this morning there was a pair of clippers on my bedside table.

Two more nights and my husband is home. I am booking my spa day for Saturday, then we have an adult-only Christmas cocktail party that night, then we are heading out to Brooklyn so see some friends. Things, my friends seem to be looking up. Now if I can only get all my Christmas shopping done. . .

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Happy Birthday to My Brother!

Love you Ea! Hope you have a great day.

BTW. . . this photo is saved under the title "whyeaissoweird"

Another Day Down?

Dear Disney, um wait, that was another letter, another time when the weather was warm and the Ladies were distracted daily by princesses and cupcakes and fairy dreams. Let's begin again.

Dear Reality,

Why are you hitting me so hard? It is only Day 5 and I feel like it should be Day 15. Things have happened here that could make a quasi-sane mother of two pack up the car, drive to California, drop the Ladies off on the hallowed greens of Pebble Beach, get back in the car and hit Vegas hard.

I think the only thing that is keeping me going is those few seconds every morning that the Lady opens up another door on her Advent Calender and I know that I am one day closer to my husband walking up those f'ing stairs. To be honest, my everyday schedule isn't that different from when he is home. I still work two days, I still hang with the Ladies on the others. It is just those moments at night when the day is clearly done and I am clearly done and the Ladies are clearly not done that are making me throw myself a pity party and have made me, literally cry.

It might be easier if I didn't feel like crap. If my nose wasn't stuffed up and I wasn't going through tissue after tissue. It might be easier if the Little Lady felt better. It might be easier if the Lady would just go to sleep in her own bed.

Oh, reality. Why? Why? Why?

Why have you shown me great days (oh, Day 2 how far away you seem) and terrible days (Um, Day 4 we are in a huge fight) like some ghost of Christmas Past? Why have you made is so abundantly clear that I do not have it together and that these Ladies can cause a reckoning?

Here is a quick (sort of--if I put everything is this would be a two hour therapy session) recap of our last few days:

Day 2: Dropped off the Little Lady with my mom and the Wild Woman and hopped on a train to NYC in our sparkle shoes. Met up with my best friend and the Lady's best friend and were charmed by the wonder of Mary Poppins. Not so charmed by the guy behind me who picked up his cell phone in the middle of it or by the fact that the Lady felt it necessary to sit on my lap the entire time, but it was super cool when Mary Poppins flew right over our seats (I could see her bloomers!) We made our way out of the theatre past block long lines at Toys R Us and the Disney Store and through what was quite possibly the biggest crowd I have ever been a part of to get a glimpse at a tree. We headed back on the train and I ended our day, carrying two bundled up Ladies up the stairs.

Day 3: My SIL came by in the morning and watched the Ladies while I went food shopping. I was so drunk with the freedom of that hour and fifteen minutes that I decided to pick up a hot chocolate on the way home. I went to the Dunkies drive in, took my money out of my wallet and proceeded to drive right past the little speaker. Clearly, my mommy-mind was melting. That night the Lady informed me that she did not want to sleep in her bed. Instead of having her throw a tantrum in her room and risk waking up the Little Lady, I let her lay on the couch. She wanted all the lights off. Normally, this wouldn't be too big of a deal, except the place was wrecked, and I had work to do, which the Lady informed me I could do by our electric candles and the light from the computer. When her father finally called a little after eight. I was on the edge. When the Lady started crying and telling her dad that she missed him and wanted him to come home, I started crying. She also informed him that she didn't want to sleep in her bed because there were alligators and a snake scratched her leg. Needless to say, the work was put away and I retired to my room at 8:15.

Day 4: Oh Dark Day. This day actually started out ok. I realized that I had a Moms Club meeting, which meant the girls had a playdate, I had some adult conversation time, hot beverages and a nice snack. After the meeting we went to the Lady's school to pick up our Christmas wreath and they served some hot cider. So far so good. . . The Little Lady feel asleep in the car and transferred well into her bed. The Lady had some independent play time and I got some work done. All was well at 1:00. We were looking forward to the pj and pizza Santa sing-along party that evening at 5:00 and getting a chance to meet Santa. What I was ill-prepared for was the Little Lady taking a tumble down 13 stairs. There is nothing, nothing, like the sound of your one-year-old falling down a wood staircase to make you run faster then you probably ever have before. She was crying, I was crying. Things could have been so much worse. After a quick once-over, I realized she was more scared then hurt. She was crying, breathing and nothing seemed bruised or broken. Yes, this was totally my fault. I shouldn't have left them alone upstairs why I went down to get them something to drink. The gate was up, but the gate isn't that great and the Little Lady can get over it if she really tries. She also thinks she can walk down stairs. Ugh. So, with a great deal of mommy guilt, I watched over her for the rest of the night. She was dancing and moving at the Santa sing-along, she wasn't acting off or odd in anyway. This however, didn't stop me from worrying about her, so when I heard her stir at 3 am, I decided she should come down and sleep with me. You know what they say about waking a sleeping baby? It still applies when they are one. The Little Lady could not get comfortable, she would pop up every 10 minutes or so, point at the TV and say "Melmo." She was at various points sleeping next to me, on top of me, in my armpit and across my face. At 4:50 I decided that I had enough and that she probably had too. Back to her bed she went until 7 am, when I heard her little voice call my name. Don't even get me started on the Lady and her bedtime issues. . .

Day 5: Is it bad that I am happy to be at work?

So Realty, please try to go easy on me for the next week or so, I am not feeling great, I am already consumed by guilt and there have been two nights of freezing cold weather when I had to get both Ladies into the house.

Just give me a pass today, and maybe tomorrow. Help me to remember that if he could be home, my husband would be (well, maybe just home sooner) and that these Ladies and I can make do with each other. Let's just avoid any more stair incidents and let's try to limit the temper tantrums.

Love and kisses,

Bean

Friday, December 3, 2010

Day One is Done

The Ladies are in bed. Neither one of them is actually sleeping, but they are in bed.

I am going to sweep the floor for the six hundredth time today and cuddle up with the DVR--can anyone say "Top Chef-All Stars?" Awesome.

Tomorrow we have plans so hopefully the day will go well. Today we had some minor incidents, nothing out of the ordinary. A few markers up the nose, a bumped head and the Lady rifling through the box of clothes that is going to be donated and insisting that her princess sneakers still fit. We brought in some Christmas decorations and I actually got a little bit of cleaning and organizing done. One good thing was that we didn't have anywhere to go, so I didn't have to bundle up the Ladies and drag them out. One bad thing was that we didn't have anyplace to go, so the Ladies and I were inside all day long.

So we have marked one day off the calendar. At this point next week, I might be a very different person but until then I say "Day two, bring it on."

Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Countdown has Begun. . .

Officially, my husband doesn't leave for California until 4:45am tomorrow morning. I have begun the countdown today because between the packing he still has to do, the errands that I would like to run before he leaves and the fact that when I wake up tomorrow morning (actually when I re-wake up tomorrow morning after he turns on lights and clomps around at 4am in his heavy shoes) he will be gone and I will be left alone with the Ladies.

It will be a cold day in Connecticut, a cold day.

As much as I will miss his company and just having him around, what really makes me dread this trip is that I am shorthanded. The mornings are already a mess and the Lady only wants her daddy. I am incapable and unwilling to carry both of those girls at a combined weight of around 55lbs down the stairs together in the morning draped with all their blankets and nonnies. Someone is always going to be left out. It is really the logistics of parenting that gets to me. I can handle the discipline, the pee on the bathroom floor, the diapers, the snot noses rubbing against my legs. I can handle the tantrums and the food ground into the couch and the general care of my children, but I can't handle the ins and outs of getting them to and from places in a way that is easy and stress-free.

I know I am going to want to get out of the house and plan activities for the three of us to do, but the thought of coming home on dark, cold winter nights, with the two of them heavy in their bulky jackets, the Little Lady probably wearing no shoes and socks because she insists on taking them off in the car, the Lady demanding to be carried, the house keys shoved somewhere deep in the recesses of the diaper bag, the thought it chills me to the bone. It chills me to the bone.

We do have friends and family we can rely on and I have made an effort to plan some things out. We have a few Holiday events that we can go to and I am hoping to do some Christmas decorating and crafts with both of the girls. I will have to make sure the Little Lady doesn't eat the art supplies but I think that we can do some great stuff together. It is just nice to have a little break every now and again. I know that when I crawl into bed at night, I will have control of the remote. Oh, Bones how nice it will be to watch you without any snide comments from my other half, but even the thought of my own personal TV time, doesn't do much when I know in a few short hours I will be summoned by the Ladies to carry them both down the stairs. I will battle with the Lady over getting bathed and dressed and in the car to school. I will have to "assist" the Little Lady in her attempt to walk down the stairs by herself, when clearly she is unable to do so, but thinks that she can and try to reel her in from her multiple excursions into the bathroom where she climbs on the stool, flushes the toilet and touches everything in a way that makes my skin crawl.

So the countdown has begun. . . stay tuned.

Sparkle Shoes

Sparkle shoes as promised.

The Lady has the exact same pair of these shoes in pink. She wore them exactly one time and that was in the car on the way home from Target. She never wore them again. They are now one size too small. The good news is that she has been wearing the silver sparkle shoes pretty regularly since she got them. The bad news is that they are basically a shoe covered in glitter, so I have been stepping on, sweeping up and trying to remove those shiny little pieces from the floor, furniture and faces of the Ladies.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

On Harry, Football, Freckles and Pooping in a Purse

It has been a busy weekend. My brother-in-law is up with his family and I headed to the in-laws with the Ladies on Friday afternoon after ballet. It was great for the Ladies to get together with their Texas cousins and it was nice to spend some time with the family. We headed back home in an attempt to beat the traffic and to get cleaned up because Momma was going out!

I was able to get a sitter for Friday night and my husband and I joined my brother and sister-in-law for a little bit of Harry Potter. Considering that the last time I went to the movies was when the last Harry Potter movie came out, I was grateful just to leave the house. The movie turned out to be pretty good and I guess the next time I step into a theatre will be for the final Harry film.

Saturday was going to be either a really good day or a really bad day. It depended on two things: 1. How cold it got outside and 2. if the Irish could actually win a football game. As it turns out, Saturday was a lot of fun. I was excited to see a football game in Yankee Stadium, but was worried about being freezing. We dropped the Ladies off at my parents, layered up and took the train into the Bronx. We met up with friends and family and the temperature didn't drop too low. Granted, I was wearing running tights over jeans that were tucked into Uggs and sporting a puffer hoody jacket that made me feel more Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man than casual football fan, but it worked out. And even though I waited on quite possibly the longest line in the Stadium for a $4 hot chocolate it turned into a good evening.



The next morning we had to head back into the City for a play with the Lady. Her grandmother invited her, her cousin and my sister-in-law and I to see an adaptation of Julianne Moore's children's book "Freckleface Strawberry." The Lady got new sparkle shoes and sparkle tights. I wasn't sure how she was enjoying the play, considering she sat there stone faced during the entire performance, much like her Disney Princess experience, but in the end she told me she loved it, she got some strawberry lip balm and had a great time.

The Lady and her Cousin. Will post photo of sparkle shoes soon.


Oh, I forgot, I am pretty sure some of you were curious about the "Pooping in a Purse" portion of this blog title.

Anyway, as I was sitting in the left-field bleachers at Yankee Stadium on Saturday night, I saw that I had a missed call from my sister. Since the game hadn't started yet, I called her back. I could barely understand what she was saying, partially because the stadium was so loud, but also because she was laughing so hard. When I finally was able to decipher what she said, simply "The Wild Man pooped in the purse you gave me for your wedding," I was in tears. Apparently, the Wild Man and his sister were playing when I guess nature came calling. Rather than attempt a run to the toilet he just used what was handy. Luckily it was empty, unluckily, he gave the purse to his little sister who brought it into the kitchen to give to her parents. Oh, Wild Man you never cease to entertain me.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

What You've Missed

It's been a while and I am sorry. Here is a recap of the highs and the lows you have missed in the life of the Three Bean Salad.

I ran into the neighbor's garbage can (again) with my car. To be fair, 1. at least it wasn't their car and 2. it is left entirely too close to the common area of the driveway where I need to turn around.

The Little Lady has continued her love for all things bathroom related and has pooped on the potty by herself twice in the last couple of weeks. Her sister has been ignoring her body's signs to go to the bathroom and instead is just going through 5-15 pairs of "big girl undies" a day because she can't be bothered to get up and use the bathroom. In a exceptionally brilliant show of sheer determination and with a keen "fuck you mom" attitude, the Lady told me she didn't have to go to the bathroom, in what might have been a very weak moment in my three plus years of motherhood, I physically lifted her up on to the toilet and tried to keep her there. The Lady wanted none of this and as I tried to remove her little sister from the area, she told me that she didn't want to go on the potty and was going to go "right here." Right here meaning, right next to the toilet on the rug.

I went to the Lady's parent/teacher conference, where I had to sit in one of their chairs. It is true, they have no adult size chairs in the room. Even the teachers have to sit on those tiny little plastic chairs made for the small bottoms of 2-4 year old kids. Anyway, the teachers said that the Lady was great, good with her classmates, good with listening and that she never gave them a hard time. I demanded video proof. I am, however, very proud of her and this week they will be starting to use scissors.

I have cried every single time I have seen one of those commercials where the parents surprise their kids with a trip to Disney World.

I have started coaching a "Lil' Laxers" program for 2-5 year-olds on Wednesday afternoons. The Lady is not taking this class, instead, I am surrounded by all boys, who spit and swing sticks and are constantly drifting off into some never-never land of inattentiveness and coughing relentlessly without covering their mouths.

I was the mystery reader at the Lady's school. I showed up with some books, they all closed their eyes, and I "surprised" them. The Lady was very excited. In order to make sure I was on time. I sat in the parking lot for about 15 minutes where I was horrified to find a chin hair while I was looking in the mirror. It is bad enough with the adult acne, but I think facial hair is a bit much don't you? How much more can one woman bear? Now, at this school everyone drives a black Tahoe and wears either their workout clothes or super cute flats to pick up their kids, so I am a little self-conscious about how I look. Imagine my horror, when I realized that this wasn't even a tiny hair, but one that looked long enough to curl. I am clearly not paying enough attention to myself. Luckily, I was able to pull it free. When we left school, we stopped at the nail place to get a quick eyebrow wax. . .

. . .at lunch, after the "mystery reading" and the salon the Lady and I met my husband. When he arrived she quickly announced to him and the rest of the line at Panera that "mom got her eyes done!"

The Little Lady has become very interested in TV. She vocalizes her displeasure if you turn off whatever is on or if you turn the channel from something kid related to something more adult. Since, she is the first one up in the morning, my husband and I have been taking her into bed for some one-on-one snuggle time. She is super cute and it is nice to spend some solo time with her. However, some mornings we snuggle on the couch, where she climbs over me to find the remote and insists on pressing the buttons in an attempt to find "Melmo."

I ran out of laundry detergent, paper towels, dishwasher detergent and Clorox wipes on the same day. This of course meant a trip to Target with the Ladies, where we were able to get all of the above, but also came home with Princess gummy vitamins, Princess band-aids, Princess toothpaste and spent about 15 minutes "browsing" the toy aisles for things to add to the Christmas list.

The Little Lady is down to one nap a day and she only naps for maybe an hour. An hour. Ugh.

The Money-Saving-Mom sent her husband to the brand new grocery store in town, where a gallon of milk is only $1.99. He came home with 4 gallons of organic milk at $5.29 a pop.

The Christmas cards have been delivered. After making 6 different versions, I decided on one and by using a combination of coupon codes and giveaways, I was able to save over a hundred dollars on the cards, two photo books and shipping. Now I just have to address the envelopes and buy the postage. I am hoping these go out before December 15th.

The countdown begins for my husband to head to Cali for two weeks. 15 more days before he leaves. I have a feeling there will be a lot of late night blog posts and peanut M&M binges as I try to navigate those days on my own.

Missed you guys. Thanks for reading.

Bean

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Mommy Mind Melt and the Bathroom in Aisle 13

My week started when I arrived five minutes late to a 9am doctor's appointment for the girls to get their flu shots.

Turns out I was actually 6 days, 23 hours and fifty-five minutes early (is this math right? I am not sure, but you know what I mean) to the appointment. It was scheduled for this coming Monday.

Ugh. So now I have to pack them both up again, bright and early, and take them to get shots. Good times. Good times.

We did go out for pancakes after our failed visit. So, I guess there was a bit of a silver lining. However, I had to escort the Lady and the Little Lady into a tiny restaurant stall for a pee break, which would have been fine if the Lady hadn't insisted on putting her hands behind her on the toilet for balance. Granted, I couldn't really hold her up, because the Little Lady loves all things bathroom related and it was in my best interest, and hers, that she be constrained.

We then hit up the Stop&Shop for some early morning grocery store excitement. We had to get the car cart again, but this time it was more of a truck. The Little Lady lasted about 5 minutes, we didn't even get through the produce section before she was sticking her head out the side and trying to climb out. Needless to say she was put in the basket seat where she ate about three pieces of white American with an abandon I have not seen since the days of the "temptation challenges" on the Biggest Loser.

We almost made it out of the store when the Lady had to make yet another bathroom stop. So we parked the cart outside of the bathroom and headed in. The Lady is partial to this bathroom. Not only does she know that it is at the end of aisle 13, but there is a small sink in there that is just her size.

So after six trips up the stairs with babies and bags of groceries we finally got settled back in the house. I guess it wasn't a bad day for getting out and getting things accomplished. If only I didn't have to head back to the doctor on Monday morning. Maybe this time we will make it on time.

NL halloween 2010

Click here to view this photo book larger

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

What's Hiding Under Your Bed?

So the hubby was home yesterday when I got back from work. He had flown in from Atlanta earlier in the afternoon. We were confined to the bedroom because the Lady was watching a "big-girl show" and we were going over the next couple of days and what our schedules would be.

Throughout the entire conversation I would catch a whiff of something foul. Could it be me? I sniffed the pits (granted I didn't shower yesterday) but I was pretty sure it wasn't me. Could it be him? It did smell kind of stinky-feet-foul but it seemed to be emanating from my side of the bed. Was it the pillows? Did a dirty diaper get left on the end table?

After much complaining, I eventually got down on my hands and knees and looked under the bed. There I found the culprit, a pink sippy cup filled with curdled milk. Ugh.

So what have you found hiding under the couch, the bed or in your car?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Little Victories

Last Wednesday was school picture day at the Lady's school. She agreed to wear a lovely little brown dress, but battled and I mean battled her father and I about putting on a sweater even though it was in the low sixties that morning.

When we finally got into the car (sweater on) we got stuck in traffic on the road to school. The ride that takes roughly 6 minutes was doubled. Needless to say we were late to school. The Lady then took this opportunity to have her first drop-off meltdown since the school year began. Some days she tells me she wants me to wait a minute and watch her, but this morning she clung to my leg and started crying. I am not sure what the protocol is in this situation, do you just run out and let the teacher's handle it? Try to calm them and coax them into the room?

So, I have the Lady crying in the doorway, the Little Lady making a beeline towards the sensory table in the classroom that is filled with unpopped popcorn and I am trying to figure out who to grab first and what is the quickest way to get out of the building.

The Lady's teacher came over and told me that I could just leave her and that it would be okay. She asked the Lady if she was nervous about the school photos, which prompted the woman who works in the office in the next room to come out and ask the teacher if she wants to switch the classes photo time so that the Lady isn't waiting around and nervous about it. I was thinking that the reason she was upset was that she was tired, having woken up in the middle of the night to pee and then ending up sleeping on the couch in the living room when she refused to go back into her bed. However, I did appreciate the effort.

So, I grabbed the Little Lady, passed a very upset Lady off to her teacher, hung out in the vestibule on the top of the stairs until I heard her little sobs subside and then took the Little Lady for a bagel, because Lord knows I needed the carbs.

I did get a phone call from the school about a half-hour later letting me know that the Lady had calmed down fairly quickly and was having a good day. I do have to say I was grateful for that.

But what I am even more grateful for was this morning when I dropped off the Lady and her teacher handed me the photos from school picture day and there she was, looking happy and adorable, and most importantly looking at the camera and smiling.

 I took this little victory with me and tried to keep it close to me when the Lady threw a fit in the car after I picked her up this afternoon. The moments may be fleeting but sometimes they are all I have to keep me sane!

Oh, want to know the best part about the photos? They give you a package with a few 4x6's a 5x7 or two and some wallets and then they let you know that if you want to keep the entire package you recieved (and who wouldn't) you have to pay $28. If you want to pay less you have to hand back some of the prints. Really? Who is going to hand back one 4x6 and a wallet so that they can pay just $26? It is a racket I tell you. A racket. But the Lady looks super cute so I think she is totally worth it!

Friday, October 8, 2010

And the Winners Are. . .

Thank you to everyone who commented on the Shutterfly giveaway post. And thanks to all of you who take the time to comment in general.

I am happy to announce the the three winners of 10 FREE 5x7 Stationary Cards from Shutterfly are. . .

(Are you making a drum roll sound in your head? I am.)

Kristen, Alison and Allyson!

I will contact you with the codes.

Thanks again for taking the time to read and comment on the Three Bean Salad!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Momma Called the Doctor and the Doctor Said. . .

I took the Lady to her 3-year-old check-up at the doctor's on Monday.

It was a cold, blustery morning and I was only able to make it out of the house and on time to the appointment with the help of my husband, who was at that point late for work.

I have settled into a routine at our pediatricians office, having been there at least once every three to six months since the Lady was born. We walk in, I have my co-pay check all written out, we look at fish, we hope we are called quickly, we go to the room, the nurse comes in and takes all the vitals, we wait for the doctor, he leaves, the nurse comes back with a shot or two (immunizations--not vodka, although, after the shots are administered, vodka seems like a good idea to me.)

Monday was seemingly no different. I kept the Little Lady in the small umbrella stroller, because quite frankly she needs to be restrained and we headed into the back. First. we had to do a vision test on the Lady, which I thought she would be okay with. So, the Lady, me, the Little Lady in an umbrella stroller and a nurse all walk into basically a closet and try to get comfortable.

The Little Lady starts to cry. I am not sure why, but maybe she is getting claustrophobic. The Lady refuses to wear the pirate eye-patch, the nurse has more than a hard time attaching the electrodes to the Lady's head with some gross white goo, that I know will only cause a tangle in her hair that I will have to battle through at bath time. Finally, the Lady is convinced to wear a butterfly sticker over her eye and the test begins. There are animals and catchy music. There is also the Lady going "NO" and turning her face away from the screen. This means having to start the whole thing over in order to retest. The already close walls starting closing in a bit more.

Finally, we were done. The Lady was promised stickers after her appointment and that got us out of the closet. The nurse then brought us to another area, which I had never been too. Apparently, once these kids turn three they are no longer measured with measuring tape on a piece of tissue paper covering the examination table or weighed on that deli-counter style scale. Now, that the Lady was three she was taken into a holding area and forced to go on the big-girl scale. Oh, you grayish/brown contraption of fear--how I dread you so! But before we were to be weighed and measured we were asked to give a urine sample.

The Lady didn't think this was a good idea. The three of us rolled into the bathroom and the Lady basically refused to pee. She did however want to wash her hands with the soap that had the pink top. We made our way back to the "holding area" where the Lady happily stepped on the scale and stood against the wall to be measured. I told the nurse we would try the bathroom again before we left.

I guess I don't blame the Lady. I am all about the shy pee when it comes to the doctor's office. Throughout both of my pregnancies, I was so worried about having to provide the mandatory urine sample that I would drink a ton of water before each visit. This didn't always produce the required result though and sometimes I had to wait until after the exam to go, then once I left I had to pee about four hundred times from that point on. Anyway, I understand the inability to always pee on demand.

So we headed to the examination room, where the Lady was pretty well behaved the doctor was able to get her on the table and overall everything went fine. When the doctor left the Lady told me she didn't want a "booster" that she was just fine in her big-girl seat. Unfortunately, Lady, we were talking about a booster for the flu shot, not a booster seat for the car. Can you say screaming three-year-old?

Needless to say, the urine sample did not happen, I got sent home with a little plastic container in hopes that I will find the time to collect said sample and drive it back to the doctors office with the Ladies in tow. The Lady found a Princess Tiana sticker on the bottom of the sticker bowl and the Little Lady seemed pretty satisfied with the cat-dressed-as-butterfly-sticker she was given by her older sister. At least that is until she started eating it in the car.

Did I mention the Lady has given up napping? Yeah, fun day had by all.

Do I dare make a dentist appointment?

Last Day to Comment

Today is the last day to be entered to win 10 FREE 5x7 Stationary cards from Shutterfly.

Just leave a comment on the post below. Looking forward to hearing from you.

Winners will be announced tomorrow.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Mommy-Land Confessions

I have a few things to confess to:

1. Today is the first day I have worn deodorant in over a week. Yes, this includes when running up to 5 miles. I ran out at some point last week. One day I used my husband's, but it is so "man-active-clean-fresh" smelling that I literally did a quick swipe as not to smell so sporty. I guess smelling like a guy is better than smelling, but coming from someone who wears unscented deodorant, it was a little too much for me.

2. Last week I took some time for myself and got a pedicure. On Friday, just one week into it, the nail polish chipped off my big toe. I raided my large collection of permanent markers, and with a combination of deep purple and black I was able to repair the damage. Yes, I know it is 55 degrees on the East Coast, but the flippies aren't going away until at least the end of October, plus, I love the dark color of my pedi and I wasn't willing to go out and get another one after only one week.

3. I have been wearing the same two bras for weeks now. These are also the same bras I wore after the Little Lady was born, while my boobs were huge (well, huger) from breastfeeding. To say they are ill-fitting is an understatement. The underwire is down around my bottom ribs and the left strap on both of them keeps on sliding down my shoulder. I know I should go get a proper fitting and suck it up and buy some good bras, but considering I haven't had time to buy deodorant and am touching up my pedicure with permanent markers, this too seems to be at the bottom of my to-do list. 

So there. I feel much better having aired out my mommy-land confessions. Perhaps this is a turning point. Perhaps, I will take a moment for myself, make sure that my armpits are dry and fresh-smelling, my toes are perfectly pedicured and the girls are perky and in their proper place.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Keep Those Comments Coming. . .

I want to thank the four of you who have commented on my last post.

Kristen, Alison and Sheils, I have sent you each an e-mail from thethreebeansalad@gmail.com with your Shutterfly 10% off code.

People--you still have time to comment and be in the running for a set of FREE 10 5x7 flat stationary cards from Shutterfly.

Just comment on the post below by Wednesday, October 6th and you will automatically be entered to win!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Shutterfly Giveaway: Stationary

I used Shutterfly this year for the birthday invitations to both the Ladies parties and was really pleased. For the Little Lady, I did a collage of photos from her first year. For the Lady, well, it was a Princess Party, so I used one of their princess-themed invites. In both cases the result was great.

I also created a thank you card for the Little Lady. Again, super cute, mostly due to the awww factor of the Little Lady, but also because of the great selection of thank you cards that could be personalized any way I wanted.

I'm planning on doing a thank you for the Lady too, it's just a matter of choosing which photos I want to include. I am certainly including one of her big cake smile.

I know this might sound ridiculous, but I already have four different versions of our Christmas photo cards saved. I haven't decided which to use mostly because I was waiting to see if we would take another family portrait--the one we took in Disney is great of the Ladies and my hubby, but I have a double chin and look crazed--or if I would just use photos of the Ladies from the last couple of months. All versions are waiting in my saved projects, too many great designs to choose from!

The Holiday designs are definitely worth seeing. From Halloween invitations through the craziest of December's there is something for everyone. Plus, Shutterfly usually runs great deals including discount codes and free shipping.

Don't forget to leave a comment. The first three comments will receive a 10% off coupon for their entire order (until November 3rd) and all comments will be entered to win a giveaway of 10 FREE 5x7 flat stationary cards (until December 31) provided by Shutterfly. Winners will be announced soon!

Can't a Girl Get a Comment? There's Something in it for You!

I am a little disappointed in you my dear readers. Last week I blogged about my Shutterfly photo book experience and let you know that the first three readers to comment would be given a 10% off code to put towards their next Shutterfly order. All you had to do was leave one little comment.

What does a girl have to do to get some comments on this blog?

I guess I have to do another Shutterfly giveaway!

Not only will the first three comments still get you the 10% off code (good until November 3), anyone who comments will be placed in a drawing to receive 10 FREE 5x7 stationary cards! (S&H not included) There will be three winners chosen. As you budget conscious people and money saving moms out there know,  FREE is a great word to see.

So, we will try again.

"These are memories people!"

Anyone who can tell me the movie that quote came from, won't get anything extra, but will win a special place in my heart.

Look for the posting later today about Shutterfly stationary and leave me a comment. No need to wax poetic about your photography skills or what photo projects you are working on, just leave a quick note to say hi. I will be looking forward to it.

love and kisses,

Bean

Some Pics from the Princess Party


Waiting for the Cake

Loving them!

Ariel
Sleeping Beauty
Pretty, Pretty Princess

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

The Lady Turns Three!

Happy! Happy! Happy! The Lady turns 3!

It seems like it was just yesterday that she was turning one.

I am grateful for her everyday in my life and grateful for those of you who have been following our adventures on this blog.

I am happy to report she had a great morning at school. I brought in some mini-brownies topped in pink icing and some star sprinkles. They were a big hit. I have to say she was super cute in her homemade crown and was glad to be there with her to celebrate.

Pics and post of the Princess Party to come.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Guest Blog: Making Mom Friends

I want to introduce a good friend and a faithful Three Bean Salad reader, Kristen, as she posts her first guest blog. I have been talking a lot lately about trying to fit in, meet new people at the Lady's school and trying to overcome my own anxiety about being in situations where you have to interact with strangers. I am currently dreading my Ladies Night Out with the other moms from the Lady's class, not because any of them have been anything but incredibly nice and inclusive, but because I don't thrive in situations that I am unsure of and quite frankly feel like I am an outsider. The Lady, however, announced today that she has new friends and proceeded to list everyone in her class.

Kristen, has a similar but in many ways much more difficult situation to deal with. Not only does she have to go out and meet all new moms (in three classes no less!) but she is also trying to meet new friends in a new place, without the support of other friends (geographically speaking--she certainly has support from me!)

Oh, BTW. . . CNY to any of you whose brother didn't go to Colgate or aren't a friend of someone who lives "upstate" in New York means Central New York.

Here is her story.

Making Mom Friends
Having (very) recently moved from a small rural town in CNY to a suburb of Nashville, it is an understatement to say that it is a bit of an adjustment. Moving in general is hard work – the cleaning out, the packing up, the unpacking, setting up a house, new doctors, new schools, finding your way to the grocery store – you get the picture! While all of this can be trying, I am suffering the most when it comes to the fact that I have no friends here. Having left a supportive community where I had wonderful friends, I am really feeling the loss.

Not being one to sit around, I sent my two older daughters off to 1st and 2nd grade respectively and jumped right in to activity finding/doing mode with my 3 year old daughter. I started on the Internet looking for “meet-up” moms’ groups -  I signed up for one only to be told I was on a waiting list as the group was currently filled. It is a group that is meant for meeting other people – I am not sure how they can turn people away, who must clearly be in need if they are putting themselves out there and signing up but who am I to judge – well, let me not speak so soon!

Next I try a story time at a (large chain) bookstore. It was very crowded and almost not worth the time it took us to get ready and get there since the stories lasted all of ten minutes. We were surrounded by many children and moms so I hoped for the best as my daughter headed for the train table to play once the stories were over. There was not much conversation for me to engage in and after a while, we left for home. Feeling disappointed and thinking that if I went back again, I may find myself turning to someone out of desperation and begging them to talk to me!

I decided to try the local library. We headed to library story time and found a lot of children and moms. While it was very crowded, it was a much better story time with a theme and songs followed by a craft. My daughter loved it and I was pretty happy that we made the effort to go. As we headed out of the story room, I was hopeful of having an adult conversation as my daughter headed to the computers to play a game. As my daughter donned the headphones, I smiled at the woman standing next to me who had a headphone clad child sitting in front of her as well. The woman did smile back but then proceeded to click away on her blackberry – she did not look up once in the time that the children were on the computers – maybe 20 minutes. In the age of technology, how am I supposed to make new friends? Maybe I can get someone’s number and text them while we stand right next to each other?!

Bean Says. . . (more, of course)

First of all, thank you for guest blogging. Second of all, all those blackberry addicted moms are missing out on an incredible friend and third of all, I think that this is confirmation that the story time at Barnes and Noble is no good. Check out a very early Three Bean for a similar experience.  Finally, I think that meeting new mom friends is harder than dating (which I know nothing about, having met my husband in high school and "dating" him from the end of college), but I think that the fear of rejection probably stings just as hard. I give you a lot of credit for making the efforts that you have. If worse comes to worse, start stalking Nicole Kidman or any other celeb living in the Nashville area! Love you. Thanks so much for doing this and good luck with all your Southern adventures. You are welcome to blog about them here anytime.

So the Second Child

The Little Lady is a force to be reckoned with. She is very clear about her wants and needs, has no problems grabbing a toy from a hand, throwing her body around like a weapon and clearly articulating who she wants to come and get her--Mom! Momma! Mommy! (Although, I will admit that I think she uses a combination of these words in reference to any adult including my husband, my sister, my mother and our sitter.)

She also is a bit more active then her older sister and a bit more of a risk taker.

Sure, Little Lady, stand up in the middle of the couch and throw your body backwards, I am sure you won't fall. Climb up into your sister's booster seat (when she is taking a nap or otherwise out of the room) sit in it and demand all her toys (can you say porcelain tea set and washable markers?) with a point of your finger and a high-pitch grunt.

I am imagining stitches with this kid. A lot of stitches.

In the last two days she has:


  • Fallen off the bed (totally my fault)

  • Gotten a bloody nose (not my fault) and then proceeded to crawl all over my white down comforter with said bloody nose (probably my fault)
  • Climbed naked on the couch and peed (I should have been quicker with the diaper, but wanted to get her off the white comforter in my room after said bloody nose incident, so decided to move her to the white couch. She is just so darn quick! Thank goodness for big pillows)

  • Flushed the toilet in the range of 15-25 times while I am trying to do other things (in my defense our bathroom door doesn't shut properly and it is easy to get into)

  • Removed a steak knife from the dishwasher while I was trying to empty it (note to self, remove silverware from dishwasher first. . .)

  • Eaten a K-cup of coffee grounds

Yes, a K-cup as seen above. She and her sister were playing with the bowls and Tupperware in the cabinets, which I do allow as long as nothing is breakable, and they happened upon a Ziploc baggie of Colombian Fair Trade Select K-cups, The Lady opened it to use the cups as wheels in the "car" she was making out of bowls and Kitchen-Aid Mixer parts and the Little Lady took a cup bit into it, then continued to bite into it. She didn't actually ingest a lot as far as I could tell, I was pretty quick to address the situation, but what was so interesting about it was that she didn't seem to have a problem with the grounds in her mouth or the taste.

Let's be honest here, the last thing this kid needs is caffeine, she will have one leg over the gate and be sliding down the bannister's soon!

Oh, Little Lady. . .

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Shutterfly Savings and Super Cute Photo Books

It is no secret that I love to take photos. Most of you readers have seen pics of the Ladies over the last two years from their first day. . .

The Little Lady

to their first day of school. . .

The Lady


I try to be quick to post these pics, either on facebook or on the blog. I also try to share as many photos as I can with friends and family. As much as I enjoy about having a physical photo in my hand, I have noticed that as I take more and more pics they aren't displayed or looked at as frequently as I might like.

In the past year I have used Shutterfly to create not only a family share site, which sends out a monthly (or weekly--depending on your settings) e-mail to friends and family with a link to my own web page of photos, but have also transitioned from just ordering prints to ordering photo books

I have to say that the photo book I made this summer with the pics from the beach house turned out amazing. I picked the best photos of all the kids and combined them into one beautiful book. I made a copy to leave at the beach house and am hoping that this will be the first of many books that chronicle the adventures of the Ladies and their cousins over the next 10 or 15 or 20 summers.

I also made a photo book for my in-laws (and a copy for us) with all our Disney photos. The best part about it is that Shutterfly is pretty good about running deals and I got two photo books (with 50 extra pages) that would have retailed for $94 each for $103--TOTAL!!

If you are quick you can still use their free shipping code SHIP30 and the code BOOK29 (which ends tomorrow) to put towards a photo book. What is even better is that you can use their Simple Path photo book maker and the book is basically put together for you. Plus all their photo books are 30% off right now.

I know that most people probably don't get as excited over photo books as I do, but to the first three readers who comment about what their next photo book will be about I will send you a code for 10% off your next Shutterfly purchase through November 3rd.

Happy Photo Taking!

love, Bean

A Few Things. . .

Snack Time

After passing by a large Oreo display while grocery shopping yesterday, the Lady asked for "oretos," which I can only imagine is a cross between Oreos and Doritos. I am pretty sure if that existed, it would be my husband's favorite snack. He is both an Oreo and a Doritos lover.

The "faux nacho-cheese chip" as they say, has not fallen so far from the bright orange bag, as illustrated by the Little Lady.






TV Time

Set the DVRs my friends the Biggest Loser has returned! Hopefully, I will not be sitting in front of the TV tonight with a bowl of peanut M&M's even though my husband bought two 56oz bags from Costco.

I, of course won't start watching until after Glee, but as long as the Ladies are in their beds on time tonight, momma has some TV time to herself!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Nursery School: Day 3

Well, our morning was a little hectic. The Ladies didn't get up until 8, so our laid-back morning routine was kind of rushed.

The Lady, refused to get dressed, ate only a cheese stick for breakfast and hid under her assorted blankets for about 10 minutes.

Luckily, when the sitter came she was able to convince the Lady to put on her clothes, while I shoved her feet in socks, finished faxing some of my work, and tried to ignore the Little Lady who was crying for me.

We did make it to school on time, but the Lady was a bit clingy. Luckily, it was another little girl's birthday today and one of the Lady's teachers was able to distract her by asking her if she wanted to see the cupcakes they were going to have.

Bless you, Mrs. McMasters. Bless you. Not only was I able to leave the classroom, you knew the exact magic to use to distract the Lady. If there is one thing in this world she loves, and one thing in this world that reminds me that this kid has to be mine--it is her love of cupcakes.

I am off to pick her up, grateful that the first week of school has come to a close and hoping that next week will be a little bit easier.

A few things. . .

Belated B-Day Wishes

I feel like this week is going by incredibly slow, even though we have been super busy and trying to keep on a schedule.

I didn't want the week to end without giving some (belated) birthday wishes to two recently-turned-3-year-old's!

Last weekend was the Big 3 for the Bunny and the Littlest Lady (who is now a Southern Belle). Happy! Happy! to you both. We hope you both had a great day.

TV Time

The new fall season is starting up and I am in a bit of a panic mode. Will I have time to watch anything? The last few weeks have been jam packed and quite honestly, the Ladies haven't been that great about bedtime. Well, let me clarify that, the Lady hasn't been that great about bedtime, which has in turn woken up the the Little Lady more than once. I am finding that by the time I get a chance to sit down and relax it is usually almost 10 o'clock.

I have great faith in my dual room-records up to three shows at a time-DVR. I just have to figure out the line up and settle in for some much needed TV-time. Oh, Bones. . .how I have missed you.

Run. Run. Run.

I am happy to report that my return to running is going pretty well. I am working up to longer runs (but still am painfully slow) and have signed up for a 10k in October. I am trying to set little goals each week, and although the scale hasn't changed much, my clothes are fitting a bit better.  

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Just Because. . .

The Little Lady has had so many photos taken of her this past year, she has adopted a "photo face." While, her mother is queen of the fake smile, the Little Lady has become princess of the face pucker.

I really believe she thinks this is what you should look like in pictures.This is not her real smile, but a scrunchy face that she puts on when I whip the camera out.








She is freakin' cute though!

A Few More Firsts


The Lady started soccer on Saturday. I signed her up for the "thumpers" class because the description said between 24 and 35 months, for first time players and it had parent participation. However, it soon became obvious that the Lady was a little too old for this class. There was a lot of high-fives given between her and her dad, but in terms of any real soccer playing there was not much.

On the recommendation of the coach, we bumped her up to the next level "hoppers." I am hoping that this is more her speed. Actually, I am just hoping for an hour where she can run and kick and get a wee bit of her energy out.

Finally, The First Day!!!

The Lady, wearing pants--pants!!!!!

Getting excited for school!
Outside of school on the first day!

Well the first day is over with. It was pretty smooth sailing on the Lady's part. We walked into the classroom, and while I signed her in the teacher distracted her with stickers and I left. No tears on her part. Very few tears on my part. I got a little misty eyed as I drove away, but was happy that she was starting something new.

I will say that yesterday's meet and greet with the teacher, was a good thing. We got to see the classroom and twice the Lady told me "I love school." We will see if this attitude and the pants wearing continues. . .

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Pre-Preschool Prep

I am still counting down the days until the Lady actually starts pre-school.

Today we went to a playground playdate to meet the other kids in the am 3's class. Turns out that there are three am classes, based on when you were born in the year.

It also turns out that even though the Lady was "buddied" up with two girls--one of them we already had a playdate with, and who the Lady played with exclusively this morning--that said "buddies" aren't actually in her class. Apparently the Lady is in the middle 3's class and these girls are in the younger 3's class, even though their birthday's are within a few days/weeks of each other.

Ugh. At least I met two moms and they will be going to some of the same things as I am, like tonight's Parent Orientation. I don't want to go alone. Had my husband not gotten home last night at 1:30 am from California, I would have made him come with me. Or had his late night been due to Fantasy Football, like it was last week--I would have insisted. But I think he might have the harder time putting the Ladies to bed, than I will nodding politely and touring a nursery school.

BTW. . . I think I was the fattest mom at the playground. Good thing I have started running again. Every little mile will help.

So, to recap:

This morning: Playground playdate
Tonight: Parent Orientation
Tomorrow morning: Playdate with our two "buddies" who will not even be in our class
Monday morning: Meet the teacher, tour the classroom for an hour
Tuesday morning: Finally. Finally. Finally--the first day of school.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Happy Birthday to The Wild Woman

Happy 1st Birthday Wild Woman!!

We love you!



The Little Ladies in matching pjs!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

School Daze

The Lady starts nursery school in a couple of weeks.

We have already met up with one of our school buddies for a pre-first day of school playdate, so that there will be a familiar face in the classroom for her. We will be meeting up for a playground playdate next week with other members from the am 3's class, then I will be attending the parent orientation that evening and the Lady will attend her orientation for an hour the day before the first day of school.

Phew.

This seems like a lot of prep work for nursery school. But in all honesty, I am actually grateful for it. I know how much anxiety I can feel when going into a new situation, so it is a good thing that the Lady will be given the opportunity to meet the kids in her class, tour the classroom and get a feel for where she will be. Actually, I think the prep work might actually be better for me. I am sure the Lady will adjust fine, but now I have to meet all these teachers, parents and kids. And, I have to leave my little girl (granted only for a few hours, three days a week) but I have to leave her and I want to be sure that I know who she will be with and what she will be doing.

I anticipate tears in the parking lot as I pull out the first day. Mine, not hers.

The nursery school sent us a packet of papers to fill out. The standard emergency contact forms and school calendar were included, but there is also a form called "Tell Us About Your Child." I skimmed over the questions:

Does your child have any allergies? Does your child have a hand preference? Then I get down to the question: How would you describe your child's disposition on a daily basis; i.e., cheerful, moody, quiet, aggressive, shy? They only left one line to answer this question.

My first thought was to point them here to my blog. There they could see how her disposition changes by the hour. Moody? Yup. Cheerful? Uh-huh. Aggressive? The Little Lady could give you an example or two.

My second thought was just to write one word: Yes. Or maybe Drama or Actress, because she certainly is capable of commanding an audience, but then I remembered that she asked me the other day "What does Dramas mean?" and I thought better of it. Perhaps, I have been using that word a bit too much. Humm. . .maybe I should just put Diva? Or maybe I can put a thousand other words to describe my sweet, caring, princess- loving, singing, dancing, screaming, moody, cheerful, quiet, aggressive, shy, creative, artistic and totally delicious little girl.

How in one line am I to describe this person who has been virtually attached to me for three years? I know her better than anyone else. I know everything that she is talking about. I have heard her have a conversation with my husband about something and I have to call into the other room that she is talking about a billboard we saw on the drive home from the park, or something she saw at the bookstore. We are a team, we have our own jargon and shorthand that is specific to our lives and our adventures.

I am not sure how I am going to feel when she comes home from school with new stories and new experiences about things she has done and people she has played with that I am not a part of.

Obviously, this is a part of growing up. Her independence is an important part of who she will eventually become, and as her mother I want to nurture that and not hold her back. I know how great she will do at school and how much fun she will have. I want her to experience that on her own more than I want to experience everything with her, but still. . . maybe I will just skip ahead and fill out the question about How do you generally handle discipline at home? This question has three lines following it and i think I can fit the answer: a combination of timeouts (even though she usually just gets up and walks away), bribing, threatening, ignoring, yelling and trying everything I can to distract her without losing my self-respect.

Maybe this nursery school thing is something we both need. I think we are prepped and ready to go.

Some Disney Pics

The Lady and her favorite Sleeping Beauty

The Little Lady learned how to climb into the stroller and turn off the lights.



The Lady

The Ladies with Mickey. If you look at the table behind us you will see Brendan Fraiser on the left. If you look at the table in front of the Ladies you will see peaches and Mickey waffles.


Seriously Lady, not one smile for Sleeping Beauty? how about looking at the camera? Help your momma out.



The Lady and her Ariel doll. Now we smile!!


Belle and the Ladies. At least Belle kept her composure. I am not sure what they pay these girls, but it can't be enough!