Tuesday, February 11, 2014

On Eating Paint and Wiping Out

So, my hubby left on Friday for 10 days in Florida. To be fair, he is working most of the time and stuck in a conference room for the majority of the day.

Still. . .

I feel like I either see my kids for 2 hours a day or 24. There doesn't seem to be a middle ground.

Being the mobile, on the move group that we are, we always have plans for the weekends and my parents were very gracious to let us come to their house to sleep over.

Packing for the four of us at this point is usually no problem. This time the Lady did have her own separate bag because we were trading kids with my sister and the Wild Woman was going to come with us while the Lady slept at her cousin's.

We piled up the ridiculous amount of blankets, stuffed animals and pillows that my children travel with, I told everyone to get their shoes on and I went out to move the cars around in the driveway and throw some stuff in the trunk.

As I was walking into the house from outside I heard QT talking to me.

QT: I mixed the paint and eated it.
Me: What?
QT: I eated the paint.
The Little Lady: He mixed up all the paint and ate it.
Me: WHAT!!!!!!!!! (Frenzied running into the room to remove the green paint from his mouth that he had eaten off the paint brush like it was some sort of snack. He had also mixed it into his cereal bowl and now we had green Raisin Bran.)

The paint was non-toxic. I had also asked the Ladies to put it away about 15 times. QT, never liking to be too dirty, insisted on changing his clothes.

This is why things take forever to do. After throwing on another outfit we all piled into the car and headed out.


Really the next thing of note that happened is that I totally pulled my vag on the corner of 77th and Lex.

These things happen. The streets of New York can be mean.

They can also be covered in black ice and coupling that with a pair of traction-less Uggs and two bags filled with bottles of Snapple, I mean you are really asking for a split-style wipe out.

I'd like to think I fell gracefully, like one of these Olympic ice skaters who just rolls right into the next move. I am pretty sure it was as ugly as it felt. Two people did stop to help me, which was very nice.

Luckily, I was able to walk limp away with a few scrapes on my hand, a bumped knee and an appreciation for all the stretching I have been doing in hot yoga.

Also, none of the Snapples broke, which was also good news since I was delivering the majority of them to my girl who had some major back surgery and second only to the painkillers there is nothing better than Diet Peach Snapple.

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