Friday, May 4, 2012

Fat Ass Friday

I finally went from a contractor to a permanent employee at work. With this change, I am able to take advantage of some of the perks of working for a large company.

In this case, using the on-site gym.

But like a lot of things in corporate America it wasn't going to be easy. There was paperwork and the Medical Center and assessments and appointments and orientations.

I guess I was thinking that it would be an easy start, I would meet with a trainer and they would ask me some questions about my fitness goals and maybe weigh me and then we would be set.

Not so much.

First there was a physical assessment, which included  getting weighed and getting a BMI measurement, push-ups, the wall sit and 20 minutes on a stationary bike while getting periodic blood pressure and heart rate tests.
Can I just say one thing? I hate stationary bikes. I know that spin bikes are technically stationary, but at least a spin class is kick-ass and quick-paced.

I would rather tread water for two hours in my green hoochie-mama/boob display of a bathing suit, while watching Alicia Silverstone pre-masticate her food and feed it to her baby, than ride a stationary bike for twenty minutes.

But alas, that was the price I would have to pay to workout.

Note to self: Don't stop working out, because if you do you will just have to start all over again and once you step off that stationary bike you will feel like puking.

Anyway, after all was said and done I was given the results. Not super pretty, but not totally terrible either. I had to make another appointment (I know, really? Come on, can't you just point me in the direction of the treadmill and give me a list of the cable channels for the TV?) to get an orientation and tour of the gym.

Finally. I got a tour of the gym and of the locker room. Can I just say one thing? They do your laundry here. Laundry. That means that I don't have to lug home dirty undies and it also means that there is really no excuse for me not to workout.

So, I am reinstating my weekly fitness post. It will be called Fat Ass Friday and I will try to keep you updated on my progress as I try to meet my fitness goals.

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